Chapter 58
“That doesn’t
count, Angel, I was further back than that!”
“You were not,
you were right in front of that crack!”
“Nick? Wasn’t I further back than that?”
“I dunno, Aaron, I wasn’t
looking.” Sick of listening to the twins
bicker as they played HORSE with Nick’s basketball in the driveway, Nick
climbed painfully to his feet. “I’m
gonna go in and get something to drink,” he announced. “You two want anything?”
But they were too
busy arguing about whether Angel’s shot had counted or not that they didn’t
hear him. Rolling his eyes, he turned to
go into the house, but the sound of a car approaching stopped him. He glanced back to see a black jeep pulling
up and could just pick out Brian and Howie in the front seat. Abandoning the idea of getting a drink, he
limped painfully off the front porch and started down the driveway to meet
them.
“Hey, guys,” he
greeted them, smiling. “Whassup?”
But neither
Brian, nor Howie smiled in return. Grim-faced, Brian said nothing, just thrust
something into his hand. He looked down
at in surprise – a magazine. Not just a
magazine, but a tabloid. The National
Enquirer. A picture of a sweaty
Justin Timberlake and Christina Aguilera arm in arm graced the cover,
accompanied by the headline, “Justin and Christina: Things Heating Up On the
Justified/Stripped Tour.”
“What the hell is
this?” Nick asked, his nose wrinkling in distaste. “Like I care who that fucker Timberlake is
bon-“
“Not that,” Brian
said impatiently, ripping the magazine from Nick’s hands. Flipping through it so fast Nick could hear
the sounds of pages tearing, Brian got to the page he was looking for and
handed it back. “This!”
Nick saw what
“this” was as soon as he looked down at the spread. The title on the left page read “Backstreet
Boy’s Heartbreaking Battle” and under it were two pictures, side by side – one
of his parents sitting in chairs, his mother’s face buried in her hands, his
father’s arm around her shoulders, and the other of…
“Where the fuck
did they get these?!” Nick exploded, as he looked down in horror of a picture
of him lying unconscious in the bed in ICU, a tube coming out of his mouth and
his molting head uncovered for the world to see.
“I don’t know,”
Howie said carefully, “but I have an idea.”
He pointed to the caption below the picture of Nick’s parents, and Nick
read it, seething. “Nick’s parents
struggle to keep their composure as they wait for word on their son’s
condition. ‘It’s just so hard,’ sobs a
tearful Jane Carter. ‘We just keep
praying that our baby will make it through this.’”
Nick’s mouth
dropped open. “Oh my God… she didn’t…”
“Unless they just
randomly quoted her, she did,” Howie said gently. “And where else would they have gotten the
pictures. Hospital security was tight
around you, Nick. They couldn’t have
gotten in unless a family member let them… unless she took them herself.”
Nick shook his
head, unexpected tears rising in his eyes, distorting the magazine
article. “I can’t believe she did this,”
he said hoarsely, drawing the back of his hand across his eyes.
“It’s okay,
Nick,” Brian said gently, slinging an arm around him. “It’s out now, and there’s nothing you can do
about that, so forget about it. But you
can do something about the cause of all this…”
“Yeah,” Nick said,
squaring his jaw and nodding. “Yeah, I
can. And I will. She’s screwed me over one too many
times. This is the last straw.”
Exchanging
glances, Howie and Brian nodded regrettably.
Nick knew they couldn’t relate.
Both were “mama’s boys” themselves; they came from nice, normal families
and had nice, normal mothers who loved them rather than take advantage of them
for money or attention or whatever it was Jane Carter was in search of. Why did he have to get stuck with such a
screwed up, dysfunctional family? He
loved them, he really did, but they, his mother in particular, got to be too
much at times. This time was the worst
though. He had been pissed off enough
when she had gone to the Enquirer with her sob story about how he had
chosen Mandy over her and deserted his family at Christmas. But this… this was a million times worse than
that. She had exploited him, put him on
display, and all so that she could sob about how rough she had it and gain some
sympathy from the world. And he hated
her for it.
He had said he
hated her many other times, even believed it sometimes. But now, he was sure of it.
He hated
his mother. Hated her with every fiber
in his being.
And he wasn’t
going to put up with her anymore… her fakeness, her lies, her backstabbing.
He was through.
She was out.
***
I gave you everything
I gave you
trust and salvation
I gave you
everything that I could provide
I gave you
strength to stand and you shoved me
Down
I know you
want me to love you
But all you
ever do is bring me down
Won’t you go
away forever
I felt the
world of pain
Brought to the
water then left me dry
Took the drug
from the user
Took all my
strength to run then shoved me
Down
I know you
want me to love you
But all you
ever do is bring me down
Won’t you go
away forever
It’s kinda
freaky just to see you crawl
And all you
can do is stare
I know you’re
tripping
While I kick
you to the curb
Like you
kicked me
I know you
want me to love you
But all you
ever do is bring me down
Won’t you go
away forever
- Fuel, “Down”
“OUT!” Nick screamed.
“What?!” Jane gasped. “What did you say to me?”
“I think you heard,” growled
Nick. “I said, OUT! GET OUT!”
“Nicky… what’s wrong?”
“What’s wrong? THIS is what’s wrong!” He tossed the magazine at her, and it hit
the kitchen floor with a splat, landing in a crumpled heap. “You went to the fucking National Enquirer
and took pictures of me while I was fucking comatose?!”
“Oh, Nick, it wasn’t like that,”
Jane tried to defend herself. “I did it
for your fans. The press had been
relentless, trying to contact you for interviews and things, and I thought
doing this would stop-“
“For my fans? Oh yeah, it was so great for all the little
ten-year-old girls to see pictures of me like that! You probably scared the crap out of them! And that’s not even half of it! What about me, huh? My personal life? My body?
My rights? You totally exploited
me!”
“Nick-“
“I’m your son! How could you do that?!” He was near tears now; he had never been so
enraged with her in his life. Then
again, she had never done anything so horrible to him.
“Nick, I…” She shook her head, at a loss for words. He had rendered her speechless. Well, good, he was tired of all her lame
excuses. For the fans, his ass. It was for her, all for her. She craved attention and apparently was
milking his cancer for all it was worth, trying to be the victim, the
oh-so-supportive, loving mother that everyone pitied for having such a burden
upon her. Not to mention, she had surely
been paid a hefty price for those rare photos, and he knew how important money
was to her, even though she was already swimming in it, thanks to him.
“You need to pack your things,”
Nick said slowly, his teeth clenched, his shaking hands balled into angry fists
at his sides, “and get the fuck out of my home.
Don’t call me, and don’t email.
As far as I’m concerned, you are no longer my mother.”
Jane’s eyes were bright with
tears, but they did not affect him. He
no longer cared. She had hurt him so
badly that he wanted to hurt her back and felt no remorse when he did so.
“Fine,” she whimpered quietly,
turning on her heel and leaving the kitchen.
As soon as she was out of sight, he left the room himself, storming
upstairs to his bedroom and slamming the door shut, locking it behind him.
Ten minutes later, there was a
knock. He ignored it.
“Nick?” came his brother’s
voice. And still, he ignored it
“Nick, come on, let me in!”
Aaron sounded upset, and his
love for his brother giving in, Nick grudgingly hauled himself off his bed and
went to the door, unlocking it and opening it a crack. Peeking out into the hall, he checked to make
sure Aaron was alone and then opened the door wider, letting his brother
in. He closed and locked the door behind
him and sat down beside Aaron on the bed.
“Go apologize,” Aaron urged
him. “Mom’s a mess; she’s all crying and
stuff. She’s making us get all our stuff
together; she said we’re going home on the next flight.”
“Yeah,” Nick said tonelessly.
“I don’t wanna leave!” Aaron
cried. “I haven’t gotten to spend any
time with you, and if you and Mom don’t make up-“
“I’m sorry, bro, I really am,”
Nick interrupted. “But this is her
doing, not mine. Can’t you just stay
here with me?”
“I asked; she said no. She’s making us all leave.”
“Sorry.”
“Nick!”
“Aaron, I can’t! Don’t you get it? Don’t you realize what she’s done to me? I’m not going to apologize, and I’m not going
to give her a second chance. She’s had
countless second chances, and she’s blown them all. This is it – she’s no longer my mother, and
I’m not her son.”
“You don’t mean that…”
“Yes!” Nick shouted. “Yes, Aaron, I do!”
Aaron was silent. “Fine then,” he sniffed after a moment. “Then I guess I’m no longer your brother.”
“Now stop, you know that ain’t
true, AC,” Nick said. “You’ll always be
my brother, and no matter what happens with the rest of the family, I’ll always
love you, Squirt. You know that,
right?” Aaron just shrugged, sniffing
again. Was he trying not to cry? Nick felt bad. “Aaron…”
He put his arm around his brother, hugging the lanky teen close to his
body. “Come on, AC, don’t be sad. This sucks, I know, but I ain’t gonna lose
touch with you, okay? You call me
whenever you want, and we can email… whatever you want.”
Aaron shook his head. “It’s not the same.”
“I know. But things can never be the same now, after
what she’s done to me.”
They left it at that. Aaron shrugged out of his embrace and stood
up, wordlessly walking to the door.
“Aaron,” Nick called as he
started to unlock it. His brother looked
back. “Don’t let her do it to you, man,”
Nick advised. “Listen, if she gets to be
too much, you call me. I’ll make the
arrangements, whatever, I’ll fly you out here, help you escape.”
Aaron nodded, wiping his nose
with the back of his hand. “Okay.”
Nick smiled. “C’mere.”
Reluctantly, Aaron walked back to him, and Nick hugged him tight. “Take care, okay? I’ll see ya, Squirt.”
“You take care too,” came
Aaron’s muffled voice as he buried his face in Nick’s shoulder. “If you… if you, you know… get sicker… or
something… please call me.”
Pulling away, Nick looked down
to see tears in his brother’s eyes. He
smiled sadly. “I will. But that ain’t gonna happen. I’m gonna be better soon, I promise. And you know what? I’ll call you when I’m all better. When things are back to normal. And then maybe I can get you back out here to
visit, and it’ll be so much more fun than it was this time.”
Aaron nodded. “Okay,” he said, managing a tiny smile. “Yeah, you do that. Call when things are back to normal.”
He left then, and, locking the
door again behind him, Nick couldn’t help but hear his own words echoing in his
head. But things can never be the
same now. Deep down in his heart, he
knew it was the truth. Call when
things are back to normal. Yeah,
right.
Things would never be normal
again.
***