Chapter 20

“Mmmmmmm…no. Donwanna.” Ciara rolled away from the hot breath on her face and pulled the blankets closer. “They make breakfast too damned early on this ship.”

“Yes, they do. Come on, baby…get up.”

“Why?”

“Well, because they’re going to shut down the light breakfast soon and you need to eat.”

She heaved a sigh and rolled back around to look at the blond beauty luring her out of her slumber. Bastard. Why’d he have to be so gorgeous in the morning too? It wasn’t right. “Since when are you the voice of reason?”

“Since I heard the noises that damned stomach of yours makes in the morning if it’s not fed. It scares me.” He leaned down and softly kissed her, moaning as her hand reached up and ran through his hair.

“How much time do we have?”

“It closes in an hour.” He wagged his eyebrows at her and pulled her up. “Come on…shower time.”

“Aw, Niiiiiiiiick. I was likin’ that kissing stuff much better.”

Without another word, he pulled her out of bed and dragged her into the bathroom giggling as she stumbled along trying to get her feet to remember how to walk. Once in the bathroom, he pulled her in, closed the door behind her and quickly yanked her nightshirt up over her head.

As her face peeked out from under the fabric, he covered her mouth with his, kissing passionately, almost furiously. Now THIS was the way to wake up. Not wanting to waste another moment, she slid her fingers under the waistband of his boxers and slipped them over his hips letting them pool at his feet. He stepped out of them without releasing their kiss and made the same motion of her panties…sliding them off her hips, pulling back long enough to take in her naked body. He loved her body.

As his eyes traveled back up her legs to her hips to her stomach, they landed on her chest…on her scar. She shifted uncomfortably, never at ease about that stinkin’ thing. “Nick…”

“Yeah?” He reached up with a finger and traced up its length right between her breasts and smiled as he saw goose bumps forming on her abdomen at his touch.

“It’s ugly.”

“It’s beautiful. It’s you, Ci.” He bent down and licked the same path his finger had just taken. He’d never really spent time on this part of her before. He’d kiss her breasts, he’d kiss her chest and stomach, but knowing how uncomfortable she was with the scar, he always skipped it. Today, it was just…it was part of her and he wanted to enjoy all of her.

She couldn’t help but react to his touch again, even if it was there. The area had been numb for a good year, but now it was highly sensitive and his touch, his tongue…it was making her weak. As his hands cupped her breasts, she pulled his head back up for another kiss.

They needed to hurry, but their need for each other was great. He picked her up and carried her to the shower, turning on the water as she ran her hands over his back, ass and arms. He spun back around to her, letting the warm water run down his back as he captured her lips in his again, running his hands all over her body. He wanted inside her so bad…she wanted him there, but they knew from previous attempts that with her height it just did not work. Period. They were going crazy.

Pulling back, she finally gasped. “Okay. Stop. Wash fast…I need you, Nick.”

“Mmmm…God…okay, yeah. Who the hell designed you so short?” He grabbed the shower gel and squirt it on two washcloths handing one to her and began washing her shoulders and arms.

“My mama and papa, big guy. Sorry.” They washed each other, desire building with every move. She switched spots, getting her hair wet under the water and moaning as he captured her breasts in his mouth again. “Oh God…Nick…Come on…up here…wash my hair.”

“Yeah, yeah…okay.” He squirt the shampoo in his hands and rubbed it in her hair working his fingers firmly over her scalp. She moaned at his touch and rested her forehead on his chest as he continued to massage her head.

“You could do that all day, you know?”

“Uh, no, I couldn’t…look down.”

She kept her head on his chest, opened her eyes and smiled. Well, well now…she supposed being relegated to just massaging her scalp would be cruel and unusual punishment for such a, uh…happy boy. “Guess it’s time to wash your hair now, huh?” She brushed a finger along the vein of his penis, grinning when his knees buckled.

“Dammit, Ci…let’s just get out of here…”

“Get on your knees…I can’t reach your head.” She leaned back in the water, rinsing the suds out of her hair, feeling his eyes all over her.

He took her face in his hands as she finished rinsing, looked in her eyes and smirked. “Oh yeah? Can’t reach?” He took one of her hands and wrapped it around his length.

“It’s lovely, Nick, but not THAT head, smart ass…do you wanna get out of here or not?”

“Kneeling, kneeling…” He lowered himself on his knees and realized the benefits of such a position with such a short woman. Boob high. Oh yeah. He went to work with his mouth and hands as Ciara tried to concentrate getting shampoo in her hands and in his hair. He was not making this easy.

Finally satisfied with the sudsing job on his hair she pulled him up and switched spots so he could rinse off. God, he was beautiful. Now it was her turn to look him up and down, taking in the man who hadn’t walked out of the door the night before like she thought he would.

She ran her hands over his chest, stomach, leaning down to slip her tongue into his navel and finally feeling him pull her head up to look at him. “Done. Out. Now.”

She reached behind him and turned off the water, sneaking a kiss to one butt cheek on her way back. He threw the shower door open and grabbed a towel throwing it onto the floor. The couple met up again in a passionate kiss, clumsily making their way to the floor of the bathroom.

He lowered her on her back stopping but for a moment for one more kiss to the scar on her chest. She arched her back to him amazed at how good it felt…how accepted she felt when he did that. No one had touched it before like that. No one. It was an amazing, surprising turn on. He looked up in her eyes again and moaned her name as he slowly entered her. Finally.

Ciara wrapped her legs around his waist pulling him closer, amazed at how wonderful their union felt…like it was the first time, every time. He kept his eyes in hers as he began his steady rhythm, increasing it in no time. She threw her hands over her head and he pinned them there with his as their pace increased, his thrusts getting stronger, deeper, closer.

She called out his name as she came and pulled him in closer as she saw in his eyes his release too was near. She loved to watch him at just that moment…watch his face, feel his body tense, feel his warmth spread through her insides. A groan escaped from the deepest part of him and he collapsed his head in the nape of her neck as he tried to breathe normally again.

After a few moments, the cold, hardness of the floor came back to impair their bliss. “Oh man, Ci…did I hurt you? You okay?”

Running her hand through his hair and groaning as he slid out of her, she smiled. “Yeah, I’m okay. I’m just sorry I’m so damned short.”

“Whatever…I’ll sacrifice. God, you’re amazing.” He looked up at her and kissed her tenderly.

“Ffffooooooooooodddddddddddd!!!!!”

“Oh Jesus…it’s time to eat!”

*****~~~~~~******~~~~~~

“Can I ask you a question?” Nick and Ciara walked hand in hand along the promenade watching the sun set in the distance. She had been trying to summon up the courage to talk to him about that morning all day, but talking about sex after the fact was just…well, it was weird feeling.

“Yeah, sure.” He stopped along the rail, leaning back against it and pulling her close. “What’s up?”

“This morning…” She looked down and instantly blushed. So silly. He knew her inside out…literally. Why be embarrassed?

“…was very nice.” He brushed her cheek with the back of his finger enjoying the way the light on the deck was playing with her lightly sun burned skin.

“Yes, it was, but uh…my scar. You’ve never…I mean…what made you…” She looked down again. A professional woman for God’s sake and suddenly she couldn’t complete a basic sentence.

“I don’t know. I just…you telling me about the Lupus last night hit me funny. Brought back memories of seeing you in that hospital after your surgery. I just…”

“See, that’s why I didn’t want to tell you.” She stepped away from between his legs and stood next to him facing the water. “You’re gonna pity me now. That’s why I feel so weird about it…it reminds you of all that’s not right with me.”

“What? Wait a minute, Ci…you’re totally off base here.”

“Can’t imagine I am. I tell you about the Lupus and suddenly you decide to face reality and actually look at that thing. ‘Poor little Cici is so sick…I’ll make her feel better by touching it’.”

“Nice to know you have such a fucking high opinion of me, Ciara. Jesus.” He turned towards the water as well, resting his arms on the railing and standing as close to her as he could…why didn’t she understand?

“Well, what the hell am I supposed to think, Nick?”

“You didn’t seem to be complaining this morning. Where has your head been all day…shit…where has your head been the past few months…the past few years? Haven’t I shown you…”

“Uh…excuse me, Nick?” The young girl had heard their arguing and knew deep within she shouldn’t approach, but this might be her only chance to see him…to talk to him…to maybe get a picture with him.

Nick closed his eyes and silently apologized to Ciara, and turned to the girl. “Yeah, hi.” He ran a hand through his hair in frustration. Why now? Couldn’t she see this was NOT a good time?

“I’m so sorry to interrupt, but uh…I just, I…” She looked up at him and could tell he was irritated. He was trying to be polite, but it wasn’t working. She’d followed the boys all over the country trying to get a glimpse, a personal moment, a touch…and came up empty handed every time. “You know what? Just forget it. You guys are always too damned busy for your fans, aren’t you? Too tired, in too much of a hurry…’til it’s time for us to buy your shit…then you’re begging for our attention. Thanks a lot, Nick.”

The fan stormed off and Nick simply stood there emotionless. Ciara couldn’t believe her ears. How could that little imp be so obnoxious? She reached up and touched his shoulder but he jerked away. “Not now, Ci…seems I can’t make anyone happy. I’m sick of this shit.”

“Oh wait a minute…you are not gonna stick me in the same category as that snotty little teenager. I’m asking you a valid question here. SHE’S…she’s expecting too much. You have a personal life and she was intruding. Pure and simple. You weren’t rude, you just…you didn’t welcome her in. She had no right.”

Nick heaved an exhausted sigh. Ciara was right. The fan…that was just…an interruption. What mattered was Ciara. That WAS pure and simple. “Okay, fine…forget her. Back to what we were talking about, what did I do that was so wrong this morning?”

“It wasn’t wrong…I’ve just been thinking about it all damned day. Why now? Why this morning? Why….”

“I want you to know that I accept all of you. You made it clear years ago no one was to even mention that thing to you, so when we…when I got…you know…” Now he was the one embarrassed. Craziness. “I just avoided it because I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable. But last night when you told me about the Lupus and then this morning when I saw you standing there in front of me…I saw all of you and…Ciara…”

He took her face in his hands. “You’re beautiful. All of you. Scars, aches, pains, shots, puffy face, funked out moods…all of it. I was tired of skipping a part of you.”

She smiled shyly and slid into his arms. “It did feel incredible. No one’s ever done that before. No one’s ever…” She stopped short and just sighed. No one’s loved her before and she knew that’s what it was. But there was no way she was going to say that. Because as much as she wanted to trust him, she couldn’t. And it wasn’t Nick necessarily that she distrusted as much as the human spirit. Hers. His. But for now…for now she’d just enjoy the attention he gave and hopefully give him some unconditional loving in return. After seeing that fan, she realized how desperately he needed it.

He pulled her back amazed at her final words. “No one?”

“No one. My parents won’t look at it…even when I was in the hospital and I wanted them to check the healing. Never. No man has…it’s like it’s poison or something.”

“But it’s YOU. How can they ignore YOU?”

“Maybe I encourage it…I dunno.”

He slung his arm over her shoulder and sighed. “Yeah, you’ve been known to do that…but I’m glad you let me in a little more.”

“Me too.”

“Come on, let’s walk…looks like we’re getting a storm.”

They walked arm in arm for a long time saying nothing, watching the clouds form and breathing easier when they realized the boat was turning away from them. They found a quiet spot on another level and he pulled her in to stand between his legs again as he leaned back against the railing. He loved talking to her like this. She just…she just fit.

“Can I tell you something about that scar?”

“Sure.” His hair blew softly in the breeze and for a moment she felt like she was in a dream. Minus that little incident moments before with the fan, there really had been no pressure on board. His face looked younger again, he was more relaxed than when she first saw him months ago. His eyes shone brighter than she’d seen them shine in quite some time. Time was being kind to him.

He looked down, suddenly embarrassed at the confession he was about to make. “Well, truth is…I’ve wanted to look at it, to touch it since I saw you in the hospital.”

“Oh yeah? Why didn’t you ask? I’d have shown you.”

“Well, first time, you were a little, uh…you were out of it and I figured not quite dressed. I was 15, Ci…I wasn’t gonna go peekin’ under the sheets.”

She chuckled as the little boy crept into their conversation. “Well, no, I suppose not. But after…you were there after I woke up. You could have asked.”

“No, I couldn’t. I mean, it’s not like it was on your arm and…I was too embarrassed and you were a bit of a grouch if I remember correctly.”

Thinking back, she nodded. “Yeah, most likely. I’m not a very good patient.”

“No, you suck at being a patient.”

“Thank you.”

“Anyway, that first day, when you were still sleeping, I made a promise to myself. Maybe that’s why I finally stopped treating that scar like it was sitting on forbidden territory or something. I remembered my promise.”

“I don’t believe in promises, Nick.”

“Well, I do, especially ones I make. I don’t make ‘em very often because I refuse to break them.”

“You always have been a man of your word.”

“I intend to stay that way, Ci…”

“So, what was your promise? Like you said…you were only 15…”

“Yep. But that day, when I saw that bandage on your chest, I decided that no matter what happened with you, no matter how sick you got or even if you miraculously got better, I would be there for you. I may not be physically ‘there’, but somehow, someway you’d know you were a part of me…in my life…in my thoughts…in my…” He sighed and looked even deeper in her eyes and slowly ran his finger down between her breasts over her scar hidden beneath her blouse. “…in my heart. I never imagined it’d be like this…I couldn’t at that point. That would have been ludicrous. You were just…just Cici, but I knew I’d always be there for you. And I meant it. And Ciara?”

She couldn’t even talk. She just blinked in response, permitting him to continue.

“I still mean it.”

A huge bolt of lightening and even louder clap of thunder jolted them out of their privacy.

“Holy shit! I thought we were going away from the storm!”

Nick turned around to look out over the water. “Yeah, looks like it, but we’re gonna hit some of it…come on, we’d better hurry before we get drenched.”

***

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