Chapter 53:
An Understanding
Kevin picked lethargically at his
breakfast, his appetite gone. Finally giving up, he sighed and stood up,
collecting the half-touched food from the rest of the guys to toss away. It had
been a stressful morning, with AJ and Nick waking Howie and him up, informing
them about Brian. Now, two hours later, and after many heated discussions,
nothing had been resolved and everyone's patience was wearing thin.
Kevin sat back down, rubbing his face
briskly with his hands in hope of stimulating both his weary mind and body.
"Okay, looks like we're pretty much back at the beginning," he
started, trying to ignore Nick's impatient glare. "Now I know it looks
suspicious, but I just can't believe Brian would try to hurt Nick. It doesn't
make any sense to me. I mean, come on, why would he want to?"
"Oh, maybe because I broke his hand
and beat the crap outta him? Could that possibly be it?" Nick jeered.
Kevin returned the glare, pissed.
"You know, I'm getting pretty sick and tired of your lip. I thought we all
came here to discuss this, but I guess not. So why don't you just leave?"
Nick jumped up, his hands clenched in
anger. "I'm just telling you what I saw! But I guess your loyalty lies
with family rather than anyone here, doesn’t it?"
Kevin rose to match Nick, his green eyes
dark with resentment. "I'm not going to take this, especially from
you…" he began, only to have his vision blocked by Howie's form standing
between them.
"That's it!" yelled Howie, in
frustration. He pointed both to Kevin and Nick, his temper barely under control.
"Sit down! What the hell is the matter with you two?" Taken aback,
the two Backstreet Boys sat down hesitantly; AJ smiling in approval at Howie's
forceful stance.
"You tell 'em, D!" he crowed.
Howie spun on him. "Shut up,
AJ!"
AJ dropped his mouth in surprise but
quickly closed it when he saw the no-nonsense look directed at him.
"Okay," he agreed meekly.
"Good." Howie paced around the
crowded room, rubbing his forehead as the rest watched cautiously, waiting for
his opinion. After a minute, Howie threw up his hands in defeat. "I give
up."
All three looked at Howie in surprise.
"Huh?"
"I said, I give up! I can't figure
any of this out, can you?" Three heads shook no in unison. "But I do
know that for the rest of this tour, working with Brian is gonna be a bitch. My
loyalty is with you guys, so I'm not going to let Brian ruin our friendship. We
gotta stick together, okay? No fighting, no bickering between us, otherwise
this is going to tear us apart." He glared meaningfully at Kevin and Nick "After
the tour, we can figure out what to do. But for now, we're going to have to
stick together and make sure Brian doesn't do something that can hurt us
all."
Howie paused for a second to let his words
sink in before glancing at his watch. "And speaking of sticking together,
did anyone remember we have a photo shoot today?" Collective groans
emitted from Kevin, Nick and AJ. "Yeah, yeah, I know," Howie agreed.
"And by the looks of us, we had better get some sleep before it's time to
go."
* * * * *
"Here." Brian heaved the heavy
black bag as hard as he could towards Xavier who was patiently waiting outside
the bank. Brian hoped it would break open and scatter its contents to the wind,
but Xavier caught it deftly, raising his eyebrows in delight at the weight. "Guess
you're on your way to be coming a rich ex-bodyguard."
Inspecting the money, Xavier gave a
satisfied nod. "It will do…for now." He grinned at the sullen
Backstreet Boy. "Come on, let's eat." He patted the overstuffed bag.
"My treat, of course." Brian ignored Xavier's laugh as they headed
towards the parking lot, flinching when Xavier gave him an appreciative rub on
the back. "Say, who would of thought a skinny white boy from
"You've got enough money to buy
whatever you want; I suggest you go find someone else," Brian spat, his
tone leaving no doubt as to what he meant.
Xavier's mouth compressed into a thin
line, the only emotion Brian saw displayed on the bodyguard's face. An old
couple walked feebly by and Xavier kept his silence, holding Brian's gaze
coolly until they had past. "And what if I want you?" he
challenged, his meaning crystal clear to both of them. Brian's struggled to
maintain his composure, the game now taking on a more disturbing turn. He looked
squarely into the eyes of his bodyguard. "Well, I'd say your outta
luck."
"Luck?" scoffed Xavier, his
disbelief plain. "Since when did I need luck? I take what I
want." Xavier let his eyes roam suggestively up and down Brian's form, the
slightest hint of a smile tugging at his mouth.
Unnerved, Brian desperately tried to hide
his growing anxiety, the swell of nausea almost overwhelming him as it gnawed
in the pit of his stomach. "I thought you weren't gay," he flung back
accusingly, remembering the church incident.
Xavier's faint smile grew wider and Brian
suddenly found the bodyguard looming over him, Xavier's immense size
overpowering. Instinctively Brian backed up, desperate for escape, only to find
his freedom blocked by the side of their parked car. Slowly Xavier brought his
face down, inch by inch, with such excruciatingly slowness that it froze Brian
to where he stood, transfixed by Xavier's intense stare. Shaking, Brian could
feel the warmth of Xavier's lips just barely graze his own mouth. Fully
expecting Xavier to deepen the kiss, Brian was surprised when Xavier pulled
back, a sly grin forming across the bodyguard's face.
"What makes you think I'm gay?"
he asked lightly, his voice filled with amusement. "I'm not." He
winked at Brian as he opened the door to their SUV. "Fear and
control," he stated simply, indicating for the singer to hop in.
Brian numbly got in, stunned by Xavier's
strategy. With sudden clarity he saw how easily Xavier had trapped him, using
the singer's suspicions to full advantage. Xavier had played the game
brilliantly. Brian turned to look at Xavier, who was watching him intently.
Nodding with satisfaction that Brian now understood, Xavier turned on the
ignition and skillfully drove out of the parking lot, picking up speed as they
headed towards the local gym.
Brian ignored the passing scenery, his
mind racing as he sat uneasily in his seat. Was Xavier gay? Would Xavier's
promise to "take" what he wanted come true? Xavier's trick to
make him uncertain of Xavier's sexual preference had worked. The anxiety of not
knowing was the mind game Xavier was now playing with him. Brian closed his
eyes, shuddering. Xavier had control. And control gave power. Deep within him
he knew that Xavier had already decided. It was now not a matter of how, but a
matter of when.
***