Nicky
Writes a Song
"Die!
DIE!" cackled Nick as he successfully blew up another evil starship on his
Nintendo 64. "Heh heh... take that, and that! That's
what you get for trying to take over the world! It'll never happen, so long as I'm
around! Nick Carter, Guardian of the Universe! Protector of Mankind! Savior
of-"
"Be
quiet, Nick," said Brian from the table where he was working. "I'm
trying to write a song."
"Yeah,"
said Howie, who was sitting next to Brian. "Shouldn't you be writing a
song, too? Remember what the record company said... we have to write all the
songs for our next album. The fans are getting tired of hearing us sing things
that other people wrote."
"Yeah,
yeah... you don't have to lecture me..." sighed Nick, turning off his
video game and taking a seat next to Brian. He snatched a piece of paper and
started tapping a pencil on it, humming the theme from his favorite video game.
Brian and Howie grimaced, but still tried to concentrate on their papers. That
worked for about two seconds.
"Nick!
Shut up!" they both yelled at the same time.
"But
you told me to write a song!" Nick whined.
"Go
write it on the couch, Nick," sighed Howie.
"Fine,
be that way." Nick walked over to the couch, sat down, and stared
at his blank piece of paper. He continued to stare at it. He stared at it for
almost an hour.
"How's
the song coming, Nick?" called Howie from the table, interrupting Nick's
daydream about starring in a movie version of his favorite video game, Final
Fantasy Four.
"Great!"
he lied. "It's coming along just great!" He looked at his piece of
paper. Scribbled on it in huge letters was 'kill howie', and underneath was a
doodle of Howie with x's for eyes and his tongue sticking out. Nick giggled
maliciously. 'Why did I write that?' he thought. 'That's not a very good idea
for a song. Better come up with a good one.' He crossed out the doodle, and
began writing.
"Brian,
Howie!" he soon shouted. "I wrote a song! Look!" He shoved the paper
under Brian's nose. Brian’s eyes moved over the paper, reading it.
"I
don't know", he said, "what he does to make you cry, but I'll be
there to make you smile, I don't have a fancy car to get to you..." he
paused. "Nick?"
"Yeah?
Yeah? You like it?" Nick babbled happily.
"Umm...
well, I do like it, but we already have this song... it's called
All I Have To Give.... there's a video for it and everything. Remember?"
"Hells
no! I wrote the song! You're just trying to take all the credit
for it! Well, you won't get away with it! Because I'm Nick Carter!
Guardian of the Universe! Protector of Mankind! Savior of-"
"Give
it up, Nick," said Howie. "We're trying to work."
"Hells
no! Justice will be done!" yelled Nick proudly, and he stormed out of the
room. Brian and Howie smiled at each other, sighed with relief, and went back
to work.
Two
minutes later, Nick appeared in the doorway with AJ.
"Alright,
AJ," said Nick. "Tell them that I wrote this song, and that it's not
on any of our cds."
"But
it is on a few of our cds," said AJ. Nick looked startled.
"Hey!"
he whined. "You said that if I gave you five bucks, you'd say that...
umm...I mean..." Nick looked at Brian and Howie and racked his mind for an
excuse to give them. "Aaron did it?" he said pathetically.
"Well,
my work here is done," said AJ. "If you need me, I'll be down at the
drug store. They've got a sale on hair dye... three for five dollars."
"Hey!"
Nick whined again as AJ strolled off, humming. "Hey! That's my five
dollars! Give it baaack!!! Brian, make him give it back!"
"Sure
Nick, just put it away when you're finished with it," said Brian absently,
scribbling away on his piece of paper.
"That's
it, I'm going to a higher authority!" shouted Nick. He stomped out the
door, and returned two minutes later with Kevin.
"Alright,
Kevin," he said. "Tell AJ to give me back my five dollars."
Kevin looked around, confused.
"Umm...
Nick? AJ isn't exactly here... " he said slowly."
"I
don't care! Tell him anyway!" whined Nick.
"Okay
then. " said Kevin. "AJ, give Nick back his five dollars." He
turned to Nick. "Happy?"
"Yep!"
"Okay,
then give me my five dollars."
"Hells
no!"
"You
said you'd give me five dollars if I told AJ to give you back your five
dollars."
"Hells
no!" Nick repeated. Kevin grabbed his shirt collar, and he squeaked.
"Ummm... here!" He took a five dollar bill out of his pocket
and handed it to Kevin. Kevin said thank you, and left.
"No
fair," Nick muttered to himself. He plopped down on the couch to sulk.
"Stop
putting it off, Nick," said Howie. "You're going to have to write a
song eventually."
"But...
but... but Aaron doesn't have to write songs!" Nick whined.
"Look
Nick... writing a song is easy. First you write a poem, then you put it to
music," said Brian. "Why don't yo go write a poem, and then I'll help
you with the music part?"
"Fine."
Said Nick unhappily. He sat down with his piece of paper.
Oh nintendo, he wrote, How could I live without you?
You mean so much to me.
When I play your video games my heart fills with love so true.
for you I'd swim the sea.
Oh nintendo, oh nintendo, you know you are my world,
oh nintendo, oh nintendo... da da da da... curled...
Oh nintendo, I love you with all my heart.
You're my one and only,
I hope we never have to part,
or else I'd be so lonely.
Oh nintendo, oh nintendo,
you know you are my world,
oh nintendo, oh nintendo...
da da da da... curled...
He
got up, and showed his creation to Brian.
"Do
you really think your video game obsession is a good topic for a song?"
asked Brian doubtfully. "And what's with this 'da da da
da curled' thing?"
"I
couldn't think of anything to rhyme with 'world'!" Nick whined. "And
of course it's a good topic! It's a love song!"
And
that, my friends, is why there are no songs on any of the Backstreet Boys' cds written by Nick.
The End
***
