The Bet

 

By Roox

 

 

“Yeah, I’m no idiot!” Nick exclaimed after declaring that he did know that he needed to turn the oven on to cook the chicken.

 

“Why the hell are we doin’ this anyway?” A.J asked leaning against the counter.

 

“Because Brian here had to go bet his wife that we could indeed cook an edible dinner.” Kevin said while glaring at Brian.

 

“Why on earth did ya do that?!” A.J asked Brian, in utter shock.

 

“Cause I had the sudden urge! Where were you when I was explaining this half an hour ago?!” Brian snapped.

 

“I was stuck on the word ‘cook’.” A.J confessed.

 

Nick chuckled “And some how I still wind up being the ditzy one.”

 

A.J smacked Nick on the back of the head.

 

“No fighting in the kitchen!” Kevin warned them when Nick turned to steal his revenge.

 

“Aight,” Nick said turning back to the oven to discover just how it worked.

 

“Aight?” A.J said “You turning all ghetto on us?”

 

“Shut up and do something,” Nick said turning the biggest knob on the oven all the way around. He then checked if he had succeeded.

 

Brian looked down apprehensively at the vegetables he had extracted from the fridge, “What do we do with these again?”

 

“I don’t know, cut them up?”  Kevin suggested standing at the back of the room, near the door, ready to run for his dear life if anything should happen.

 

“And then what?” Brian asked.

 

Kevin shrugged “I dunno dude…. One step at a time.”

 

“I did it! IT’S ON!!!!” Nick exclaimed ecstatic of his new achievement.

 

A.J clapped in sarcasm. “Hurray for you.”

 

Nick stared at him, “wow man, what are you on a roll?”

 

“Ha ha yes!” A.J said gleefully.

 

“It’s only because I can’t beat you up.” Nick said frustrated.

 

“You only ‘beat me up’ cause your twice my size.” A.J mumbled.

 

Aaaaaawwww poor wittle A.J tired of bein’ a shortie?” Nick asked mocking A.J in a baby voice.

 

“K! That’s it! A.J, come here and help me cut the veggies! Nick… uuuuhhh… take out the trash! “ Brian ordered.

 

“”Man! You sound like my mom… is it happening to you too?!” Nick asked.

 

Brian glared at him.

 

Nick obeyed mumbling under his breath “And the look too… real scary”

 

“Were the hell is D?!” A.J asked picking up a knife and staring down at the raw vegetables as if they were oversized roaches.

 

“I dunno he went to the bathroom,” Brian said cutting up a carrot.

 

“20 minutes ago? Even Howie doesn’t take that long.” A.J said.

 

“I’ll go look for him,” Kevin said eagerly accepting his chance for freedom.

 

“You better come back!” Brian warned.

 

“Yeah, I will…. Of course.” Kevin said.

 

“He aint,” A.J said picking up a long cucumber and examining it, “how the hell do I cut this anyway?”

 

“I have no idea… use your imagination.” Brian said.

 

A.J made a face. “If only it was a different color then…”

 

Aje!! You perv.” Brian said shaking his head. “C’mon man, get serious!”

 

A.J gave in and started chopping up the green vegetable.

 

 

Nick and Howie both came in a while after that in a deep discussion on how age slowly changes you.

 

“Oh give it up!” Brian said.

 

“We chopped up the veggies!” A.J said proudly.

 

“Okay… where’s Kev?” Brian asked Howie.

 

“I don’t know I haven’t seen him.” Howie replied

 

“Told you he aint coming back.” A.J said

 

“Well at least one of us made it out alive,” Howie said, “have I stressed how much I HATE cooking?!”

 

“Yeah yeah, gets your hair and nails ALL dirty.” A.J said.

 

“Ignore him…” Nick said, “he’s just cranky, scared he’ll slip and die or the chicken will blow up in his face.”

 

Howie nodded, “oh.”

 

“Okay! I’ve decided that we’ll just have buns, no rice.” Brian said.

 

Nick and A.J gigged at the word ‘buns’ from there corner.

 

“So now all we have to do is figure out what to do with the chopped up vegetables.” Brian said.

 

“Make a salad?” Nick suggested.

 

“No, there not salad vegetables.” Brian replied.

 

Nick frowned in confusion ‘salad vegetables?’

 

“Just look through a cook book.” Howie said.

 

They all scanned their surroundings in search of… ‘the cook book’.

 

“WHAT? Ya’ll weren’t using a cook book?! How’d ya cook?.... with the help of Nick’s suggestions!?!” Howie exclaimed in horror.

 

“Hey…” Nick said offended.

 

“Kevin helped.” Brian said.

 

“Damn, you mean the only one that could cook LEFT!?!” Howie said horrified by that prospect, “I’m scared,” he confessed, slowly retreating to the door.

 

“Just go find the book!” Brian snapped.

 

Howie did as he was told.

 

 

Soon, Howie found the cook book and they all gathered, searching for a miracle recipe.

 

“Why don’t we just make soup?” Howie asked.

 

“How?” Brian questioned.

 

“Blend them up?” Howie said.

 

“No, not fancy enough…” Brian said flipping through the book.

 

“FANCY ENOUGH?!?!?” They all screamed in unison.

 

“Man, we want to live and you want FANCY!?” A.J said sacred of what this was leading to.

 

“Not that fancy… just…. Well, any idiot can make soup.” Brian replied

 

“Not THIS bunch of idiots!” Howie objected.

 

“Shut up!” Nick and A.J said holding on to any shred of dignity they had left.

 

Ughhhh… what about we make dessert?” Brian suggested closing the book and turning to face them.

 

“YAAAAAY!!“ Nick said desserts were always the favorite part of his meal.

 

“Okay then, we’ll make chocolate cake, once Leigh made me help out so I know exactly how.” Brian reassured them.

 

“Oh great, just great.” Howie said.

 

After carefully following Brian’s instructions they now stared down at, surprisingly, a good enough cake batter. They poured it into a baking tray and placed it in the oven.

 

“There.” They smiled proudly at themselves- nothing had yet blown up.

 

Dangit." Look at the time.” Brian said, “Leigh will be here in half an hour!  Well we’ll just have to make soup.”

 

They all sighed in relief. They were gonna make it.

 

Brian took out the blender then hurriedly left for the bathroom, ”just put them in then turn it on!”

 

“Okay.” Nick said, “so we put the vegetables in then the…. Uhhhh…. The frozen pee-colored ice?”

 

“Pee-colored? Eeeeeewwww man its FOOD. Gross.” Howie complained about Nick’s description of the chicken stock.

 

A.J snickered “Girl.”

 

Howie rolled his eyes and decided that he was too mature to answer back.

 

Nick had already put the vegetables and the ‘pee-colored ice’ in the blender and was now at his favorite part- blending them. “Farewell poor food-“ He turned on the machine a second to early, he missed Howie yell, “PUT THE LID ON!!!!” So the food exploded in his face, splattering the whole kitchen in an ocean of freezing, mushed vegetables.

 

“TURN IT OFF!!!” A.J yelled.

 

“I AM!!!” Nick yelled back switching of the blender.

 

“You idiot.” A.J said, wiping the goul off him.

 

“MY HAIR!!!!” Howie bellowed.

 

“WHAT HAPPENED!?” Brian yelled from the kitchen door.

 

Ummmmmmm… oops?” Nick said, smiling innocently in hopes of getting out of the hot spot he had just thrown himself into.

 

“YOU DIMWIT!!!!” Brian bellowed.

 

“I’m sorry…” Nick said.

 

“SORRY!?!?! YOU’RE SORRY!!!!!” Brian yelled.

 

Ummmmm… guys?” A.J said noticing the smoke escaping from the oven.

 

“Nooooo.” Brian said, feeling defeated, he quickly took out the burnt chicken and set it on the counter. “We forgot about it didn’t we?” Brian gloomily asked.

 

“Well what about the cake?” A.J asked, taking out the cake he dipped his finger in the hot dough. Making a disgusted face he asked, “smoked cake?”

 

“You’re screwed.” Nick said solemnly.

 

“MY HAIR!!!” Howie screamed, still in shock why no one seemed to care.

 

“But there still might be a way…” A.J said.

 

 

 

Leighanne walked into the dinning room to find a neatly set table and an uneasy Brian. “Let the food testing begin!” She said, “I’m starving.”

 

Brian nodded bringing out the dinner.

 

“Good food, babe.” Leighanne said, she had finished eating a wonderfully cooked meal and was now bloated and content, “okay you win… you and your friends can cook.” She said.

 

Noticing something glitter in his eyes, guilt? She asked, “did you really-“.

 

“I didn’t.” He confessed.

 

 “Then?”

 

“Restaurant.”

 

She shook her head.

 

“A.J made me…. He- he- BET me.” Brian explained.

 

“Its okay baby, I’ll somehow find it in me to forgive you.”  She joked giving him a kiss. She then smiled.

 

He took out a crisp 20 dollar bill.

 

 

 

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