Chapter 13
Nick and I spent the better part of the morning cuddled up on the couch
together, Kahlua there between us sound asleep. We watched a movie and he made
spaghetti for lunch. I had to admit that I was totally enjoying this quiet,
peaceful birthday. Nick had gotten up to take our dishes to the kitchen and I
glanced up when he came back in the room.
"So..." He said coming up behind the couch and giving me a
gentle shoulder rub, "What do you want to do today?"
I looked up at him. Honestly I would have been perfectly content to
stay right there in that moment for the rest of my life, but I knew I couldn't.
I stood up off from the couch as Kahlua stirred restlessly and whimpered. I
laughed at her, "Looks like she fits right in... lazy."
Nick laughed back and put his arms around my waist pulling me into a
hug and kissing me.
"What's it gonna be babe?"
I looked out our large picture window at the lake. It was a gorgeous
day, the sun shining brightly out across the water.
"Hmm, " I said as I pulled him closer. "It's the first
nice day we've had in a week... why don't we go for a walk."
"Sounds nice," He said pulling away and picking Kahlua up
from her spot on the couch. "I bought a leash, we can take this little
girl for her first walk."
We grabbed our coats from the hall closet and opened the front door,
stepping out into the cool fall air. Nick wrapped his arm around my waist and
we trudged off down the sidewalk to the street together, Kahlua following
behind at a leisurely pace, carefully exploring her new territory.
We'd made it a little ways down the road when we saw our neighbors
walking towards. I had met the woman several weeks before when I was out
jogging and after that day we'd started jogging together. Kate was a breast
cancer survivor and had become an amazing inspiration to me. They came closer
and we stopped for a few moments to chat. Kate was the first to say hello as
she introduced her husband Sean and their two children, Riley and Peter. Riley
was close in age to Baylee and seemed very shy, hiding behind her father's legs
and refusing to say hello. Peter on the other hand was 10 months old and as
friendly as any child I'd ever met. He sat in his stroller and cooed and smiled
at us. I introduced them to Nick and he and Sean talked for a few moments about
fishing in the lake and how they should get together for a game of golf
sometime. It felt good to be standing there carrying on a normal conversation
with normal people. If they recognized Nick they didn't show it. We said our
goodbyes with the promise that we'd all get together soon.
"They seemed really nice," Nick said as we watched them
disappear down the road.
"Yeah." I replied, "she's an amazing woman."
"You okay hon?" Nick asked taking my hand in his and scooping
Kahlua, who was now laying on the concrete at our feet, up from the ground with
his free arm.
"I'm alright... let's keep walking."
I was alright and life was good, but there were always constant
reminders of what I was missing out on. I'd watched Kate and her husband walk
off down the road, Kate pushing their son in his stroller, Sean holding their
daughters hand as the two of them ran ahead, and I realized in that moment that
I was looking at something I'd never get to have. I could feel the tears
stinging in my eyes as we continued walking down the road. When we came to the
lake Nick laid out the blanket we'd brought with us and we sat there together
staring out at the water.
I took in the scene... Nick and I sitting there together, curled up in
one anothers arms on a beautiful fall day as our puppy played in the grass
close by. I felt good and the sun was shining.
I couldn't help but smile.
Maybe I wasn't really missing out. Maybe this was what my life was
supposed to be.
***
