Chapter 3:

Within the Darkness

The ominous darkness lingered in the air. After all these years, it was stagnant and cold. It arose from the shadows for the sole purpose of stealing life. Death was the so-called light of darkness. It was this reason alone that the beautiful creatures—who may even be revered as gods—were pale and sickly with gleaming yellow eyes; the darkness had stolen their humanity. Were all who lingered there turned into demons by the darkness?

The darkness itself seemed to reflect the heart that the demon Nickolas had acquired. It was so like creatures to be shaped by their habitats… And yet, his body was so hard, rigid, unyielding. Was the environment affected, instead, by his own heart? Was that the reason it had become such a desolate, lonely place where only death and darkness existed? And what of hope, the only light that retained a person’s heart and spirit? Where was it now? The very fuel of light, of life, was so misguided, so lost that it was missing in the depths. But… It existed somewhere, hiding, all alone. And somewhere there was a power that could restore it to everyone there. Wasn’t the demon dwelling in the darkness another entity entirely? He hid there, perhaps by no choice of his own, waiting and praying for his other life. Hope would restore it. All alone, he was merely existing and waiting to be found for as long as he could remember. Finally, the Priestess Pandora had rescued his heart.

But what exactly was the Priestess Pandora?

Minako open her eyes wearily. The darkness had swallowed all the strength in the room, for she found herself on the floor with her head leaned against the wall.

The demon, Nickolas, rested his head in her lap. Curled in a ball, his tail wrapped around him and his wings folded down, he resembled a child. He slept so peacefully and looked angelic, despite his otherwise grotesque appearance. Though only the night before his face had been so hard and unforgiving, she now saw it in a different light. His features were not as rigid as before, and were actually quite soft. His eyelashes rested lightly on his cheeks and his eyes had calmly closed. The night before, his eyes had been so intense, but now he seemed to find peace in his rest. His face had been so pale, so sickly, but now his cheeks seemed to pink. His lips, which were much fuller than Minako had noticed, actually curved into a slight smile. His tousled hair fell around his face lightly. Did he find peace in knowing he was protected? Even as the stale air loomed around him, she held his heart in her hands. It was safe there; even its glass would not shatter.

Minako smiled in his peace. Could hope be restored to him from its hiding place? Before, he had spoken of his disheartened feelings toward the priestess Pandora and all the others for their faith, because he believed everything to be a lost cause. But now it seemed to return to him as well on her appearance. Could it be that hope was never really lost? Even if it was in hiding, was it still present in each person?

She closed her eyes. Pandora was the guardian who lit the torch called hope. And, as Nickolas had said, the names of the cardinal demons rested in her heart. They were very faint and hidden somewhere just beneath the surface, but they existed there in a very small, fragile whisper. They called to her, in a way that was almost imaginary.

She put her hand to her heart, that stinging feeling… It was almost more painful than a cut or stab. And in a way, it was something more vital than that. An injury is something people can usually brush off easily anyway. It was something very close to her own being. Was she like those characters in the movies that died in one realm and were reborn in another one? Had she suffered with these demons before? Or, was she born to suffer with them? It felt strange to want to break down into tears for a creature she had never met. Still… for a demon he seemed…. very human…

She pulled him closer and petted his head gently; he stirred and his feet fluttered slightly.

What was the difference between a demon and a human? Was it appearance alone? Or was it something even more vital? Did a demon possess a different kind of heart from humans? And Pandora… Was she a demon herself? It almost seemed like she would have to be something sinister to associate herself with creatures that lived and breathed darkness.

Minako lifted her hand lightly and Nickolas’ eyes opened slowly.

He blinked a little while his eyes adjusted to the light. He seemed in a daze; as if it were the first time he had slept so soundly in a long while. He moved his head so that his weary eyes could look into hers. Those baby blues of his were the ocean of his troubles. Every pain, suffering, longing, and wish rested in that ocean. None of these fell to the depths of the ocean, but sat on the surface. The emotions that had capsized were happiness and faith, but at least his faith began to rise to the surface once more. How was it that such heavy emotions could float on the surface of his eyes and his heart? The night before, his stare had been ice cold, but now his eyes seemed to be warmer than ice.

Was he often told his eyes looked sad and cold?

His weary eyes still blinked, as though they stared into nothingness even as he looked at her.

“I’m sorry…” Her voice dropped in her concern, “Did I wake you?”

His voice shook slightly from his weakness; “No…” He turned his head slowly, “I’ve been thinking….”

“Yes?”

“Why… were you crying for me?”

“Why?”

“Was it pity?”

Minako turned her head from him, quickly shutting her eyes.

“It’s… okay if that’s the reason…”

She turned back to him, “It was more like… I couldn’t imagine being so utterly alone… And it broke my heart…”

“Isn’t that pity…?”

She shook her head lightly, “It’s more like… empathy.”

“Is that a special kind of pity?”

“No… It’s like a mutual understanding.” Minako smiled a little as she patted his head once more. The tip of his tail whipped back and forth slightly. She laughed a little, “Just like a puppy.”

Nickolas looked back at her. As he watched her laugh, the smile disappeared from his face. The anger and hardness did not return, but his eyes blinked slightly, as though he were confused by her cheerfulness.

Minako put her hand to her mouth gently and pulled her hand from his head.

Nickolas turned his head once more, “Was I… here all night…?”

“I don’t remember falling asleep, but I guess you must have been…”

He closed his eyes again, “Oh…”

She lowered her hand into her lap, “Do… Do those chains hurt your wrists?”

Nickolas opened his eyes once more and rose one hand slowly to look at the chain. The metal clinked against the ground as he moved his hand. “They’ve… always been there…”

“They’re not too tight?”

“They fit fine…”

“But wouldn’t you be more comfortable without them?”

“I’ve always worn them… I don’t think it would be any different…”

“How long is always?”

“It’s… been a long time…”

Minako pulled one hand up to her face again, “Do… Do you…”

“Hmmm…”

“Do you hate me?”

“Why?”

“I left you here all alone. How terrible that was…”

“You let me lay in your lap… Just like a child…” He curled his knees into his chest. “I wasn’t all alone here…”

“No… All these years…”

He closed his eyes once more. “I heard… a long time ago, that a Priestess appeared in Rubiihoppou. She was condescending and hurtful to the demons she claimed to protect. Their hearts shattered because of her cruel treatment…”

Minako lowered her hand. “You… think I’m like her…”

“It would be a lie if I disagreed and said it hasn’t been a long time… But you stayed with me all night…”

“Do you resent me?”

“I don’t understand that word…”

“It’s mild hate.”

He turned back to her; his eyes seemed to hold a child-like innocence. “I already said I didn’t hate you…”

“It’s… a little different than that.”

He pulled one of the chains at his wrist, “I don’t like emotions… They’re too complicated.”

She laughed a little, “I don’t think anyone really likes them.”

“It’s difficult…” He looked up at her with those pained, child-like eyes.

She wanted more than anything to reach out and grab him so she could hold him close. She was not sure which was stronger, her urge to hug him because of his sadness or her urge to cry at the overwhelming sadness of this place.

He took in a breath at her expression. “Ummm… Do you miss it?”

“It?”

“That dream you woke up from…”

She turned her head slightly, “That is…” A few tears began forming in the corners of her eyes as she lowered her head.

Nickolas cocked his head slightly, “Do you pity it?”

She rose her hand to the corner of her eye to wipe away her tears, “Pity… no…”

“But you’re crying…”

“Do you only ever see them crying when they pity you?”

Nickolas clenched his hand lightly, gripping the dirt at the bottom of the cage, “They always call me a ‘Poor creature’ and pull back from me… Then they look back with tears in their eyes…” He released the tension in his hand, “Am I so pathetic that I must be pitied constantly?”

“What is the difference between humans and demons?”

“Humans hate demons…”

“But… Humans hate other humans too… That’s why there are wars, right?”

“I don’t like them… They’re too cold…”

“The priestesses?”

“They’re a bit different… More like us….”

“Us?”

“Demons… They’re more like demons…”

“Why?”

“They’re also bound by chains… Different from ours, but… They’re still bound…”

“Chains?”

Nickolas lowered his head slightly, effectively curling himself into an even tighter ball. “Chains are for binding people, so they have to follow orders.”

“Orders?”

“People who are free do what they like. They leave and move and run from the things they don’t like.” He let out a sigh, “They aren’t trapped.”

“Trapped how?”

“Here… Trapped here, in the darkness…”

“Does it… hurt?”

“No. Not me… But… it’s really, very lonely…”

“But you said that…” She lowered her head. Maybe it was better not to bring that up.

“I can’t… I can’t tell them it terrifies me… Then they’ll die…”

“I don’t understand…”

“She… died…”

She rose her head slowly, “And if they’ll die, why are you telling me?”

“You’re a lot stronger than them… That’s what Pandora is…”

“Pandora is?”

“She’s a concentration of strength.” He closed his eyes lightly once more.

“Nick…”

He opened his eyes slowly as tears fell out of them.

She put her hand to his face lightly.

He clenched his fist weakly and rose it to his chest. “Hearing that name…”

Minako lowered her head, “I’m sorry… It’s ‘Nickolas,’ isn’t it?”

He closed his eyes, “No, it’s fine…” He swallowed, “It’s almost painful, but… It makes me happy…”

“Nick…”

He swallowed again. “I’ve been waiting… I’ve always been waiting…”

All alone… in the darkness… It sounded like a sad fairy tale.

He let out a small laugh, “I must sound extremely pitiable right now…”

“Nick… what is your greatest wish?”

“I… want it back… What else could I want?”

She smiled lightly, “If you got that, what would you want?”

He opened his eyes slowly, “I would want… to see the world and leave this place.” He turned sadly, “But… I can’t go anywhere…”

“Those chains are broken… They can’t bind you to one place, can they?”

“They mark me as unfit… and unwanted…” He closed his eyes once more, “There are invisible binds, bindings stronger than any visible ones could be….”

“Do you want to be free?”

“I…. don’t understand…”

“You want to leave this place, right?”

He opened his eyes. They seemed almost empty. “Yes…”

“I’ll help you do that.”

He sat up, blinking his eyes open quickly. “How?! How can you do that?!?!”

She pointed to his chains and smiled slightly, “I’ll help you remove your chains. Then you won’t be bound to anyone but yourself.”

“Remove them…?”

She lowered her head, “It means leaving behind everything you know, though… It might be hard to move without them.”

He shook his head in disbelief, “Can you do that?”

She turned from him slightly, “I don’t like the idea of anyone being bound to something they don’t want…” She turned back with a smile, “So it’s worth a try, right?”

Nick nodded and held his arm out. The chain clinked against the ground.

Minako pulled a bobby pin from her ribbon, the hanging strands fell loosely from their own weight.

“Hold still, alright?”

Nick gave her a sharp nod.

She thrust the bobby pin into the locking mechanism. It seemed to be different from most other locks, in that the intricate pattern of the grooves refused to snap under pressure. Minako lowered her head and shut her eyes. Why? Why was this so difficult? She tightened the grip of her other hand. Break… Please break…

There were a few clinking sounds.

Minako opened her eyes slowly. All four of the metal bracelets from the chains had shattered and lay on the ground around Nick.

He gaped at the shards of metal.

Minako rose her hand to her head, “They… broke….”

Nick rose his hand to his face and examined his bare wrist. He turned it weakly. It was gone. After all these years, they had finally broken. He turned to his second wrist, they had all broken. He had spent all these years trapped in a cage, always changing but never really changing at all. He had always been bound by something he could never see, even after the day the chains finally broke. Even after that day, the bracelets still bound him. His life was an existence of chains. He always tried to go forward, but he was always pulled back and held prisoner. He clenched his fist, his claws hitting his skin. It felt as though an enormous weight had been lifted from him. Was this the meaning of being free?

Minako smiled, “I guess I could keep my promise after all.”

Nick grabbed her wrist.

She blinked. What?

Nick pulled her in toward his chest and wrapped his arms around her body tightly.

“Nick?”

“Thank you.” Tears began to stream down his cheeks, “Thank you…”

Minako lowered her head, tears forming in her eyes, “No… it’s fine…”

Nick closed his eyes, “Being forced to stay in this desolate, lonely place… It’s frightening. It’s… really very frightening…”

“Don’t worry… You’re free now…” The tears began to stream down her cheeks, “It’s the least I could do… So you didn’t hate me…”

“Hate you?”

“After all this time…”

“How can I hate you when my heart is filling up with warmth?”

Minako blushed, but felt relief that he could not see her embarrassment because his eyes were closed.

“No one had ever shown me such kindness… I was so very alone…” He opened his eyes, “But, it’s strange to me… I’ve never felt so at peace…”

He loosened his embrace so he could look at her face; it was flushed pink.

In that moment, he turned his head from hers as he felt his face growing warm. The pink in his cheeks soon covered his entire face as he bowed his head. His body shook almost violently as he turned his back to her.

Minako reached her hand toward him, but he pulled away quickly.

He stood up rapidly—albeit clumsily—and clamored through the metal gate.

She heard his footsteps down the corridor as they pounded the stone floor.

She let her hand fall into her lap. It was not enough. Even though she had broken his chains and pulled him free from this den of misery, it still was not enough. Her heart sank.

He claimed he did not hate her, but then he ran away so quickly… He must have lied. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest, but not like before. That was the first time a man had held her that way… He was a man, right? Did it really matter if he was demon or human? She pulled her knees to her chest and rested her head on them. Even though she was supposed to be Pandora, she hadn’t really helped him at all… Chained or unchained, he was still missing what had been sealed inside the box. And, unfortunately, breaking those chains didn’t immediately give it back to him.

Would he still hate her as long as it was missing? Maybe that was the only way to solve everything… Maybe she could get him to forgive her if she agreed to go with him and get that box.

She lowered her head, “Renee… Why do I even care if he hates me or not? If I could just go home to you... I wouldn’t have to think about it anymore… I could just forget…” She buried her head in her knees, “It would be nice if I could just forget…”

The darkness swelled around the room, once more concealing all those around her. The gleaming yellow eyes were the light in her fog of misery. In a way, it was almost that much sadder than it had been before. How could a mere box be more important than being imprisoned in a cage? How could it be more important than a person’s freedom? Things like that seemed more important than a mere box. Did being Pandora mean something more than just bringing together the demons? Was the box actually the key to fulfilling their wishes?

And Pandora’s duty… To light the torch called hope… How exactly does one go about lighting something unseen like that? It was a different kind of torch from a normal one; you can’t just start a fire and light it up. Did the torch of hope have something to do with the box? Were they really the same thing? Or were they more different from each other than she could imagine? And, did it have something to do with the quality of the human heart? Perhaps the way to light the torch was through kindness. And if it was kindness, then maybe Nick wouldn’t hate her anymore.

“Renee… do you think that’s the way I can get out of this world and go home?” She rose her head a little, “Yes, I think that’s why I’m still here…. Because he's still holding on to me...”

***

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