Chapter 20
I can’t believe he talked me into
this. “It’ll impress her”. Yeah, impress her my ass. If she doesn’t get sick
from the food, she’ll probably hate it. And seriously, dinner on the dock?
Isn’t that overrated? “She’ll love it. I promise.” I should’ve bet money on it.
She’ll think it’s straight up cheesy and hate it. And then she’ll think I’m
worthless and won’t want to be with me anymore.
“Good God, Nick… shut the hell up.” He
mumbled to himself. He continued cutting up vegetables as he looked up at the
clock on the stove. He had twenty minutes before she would be home. He cut
faster, and then tossed the vegetables into a pan with a bit of melted butter. In
another pan, he put another sliver of butter and melted it over the heat of the
flame. He opened the paper package that contained the fresh Red Snapper. He
shook lemon pepper on each side of the fish before laying it in the pan. He
quickly stirred the vegetables before dropping a package of uncooked rice into
a boiling pot of water on the back of stove. Satisfied with the food so far, he
decided to go get dressed.
Casual… yet comfortable. Don’t dress up too much… just dress nice.
He repeated AJ’s word over and over in
his head as he sorted through his closet. He settled on a pair of khakis and a
white and blue button-up dress shirt, leaving it untucked. Staring at his light
selection of shoes, he chose a pair of white tennis shoes.
Simple enough.
He slid the shoes on and tied them
before standing up in front of the mirror. His hair was still damn from the
shower he took before starting dinner. He tried to flatten it down, but it
stood back up. He shrugged, running his hands through it the other way and
spiking it.
Why the hell do I care what I look like? It’s RILEY. She doesn’t
care what I look like, obviously, if she’s stuck with me this long.
He took one last glance in the mirror
before returning to the kitchen. Turning the fish over with a spatula, he then
stirred the vegetables again.
He heard the front door unlock and the
door squeak open.
“Nick?”
“In the kitchen.”
He heard her footsteps stop and he
knew she was taking off her shoes. She then appeared, barefoot, in the doorway
of the kitchen.
“Dinner, eh? Oh… and dressed nice, too.”
He blushed, nodding. “Yep. Go take a
long shower and change.”
“How long?” She asked, raising her eyebrow.
He turned the fish over again, poking
it with a fork. “Twenty minutes?”
“Sounds good,” She laughed.
Disappearing from his view, she went down the hallway to her bedroom and closed
the door. Nick breathed a sigh of relief as he got fresh vegetables out of the
refrigerator for a salad.
I can do this. I can so do this.
Twenty minutes later, he was
rethinking that. She walked into the kitchen wearing a pair of dressy black
capris and a form-fitting black tank top. He felt his heart flutter and he
tried to pretend like he didn’t see her.
“Am I too early?”
“Nope. Right on time. Meet me on the
dock.” He motioned towards the back door, not looking up at her.
She raised her eyebrow again, but
obeyed, going out the back door and down to the dock. Tiny candles had been
lit, lining the edges of the dock all the way down to the very end where a
table sat, doused in a white tablecloth. A single, 4-wick candle sat in the
middle, with a set of silverware on either side. A bucket of ice housed an
expensive bottle of wine and was set off to the side of the table.
“Oh my gosh…” She whispered, covering
her mouth. She knew the guy had always been good with the ladies, but never
like this.
He followed her down several minutes
later carrying two plates.
“Nick… you didn’t have to do all
this.” She said, sitting at the table.
He shrugged, grinning. “But I wanted
to.”
He set the two plates on the table in
front of where they sat.
“Be right back.”
He jogged back to the house, returning
moments later with the salad and two wine glasses. Pouring them each a glass of
wine, he then sat down and let her taste the food first.
Her eyes lit up at the first bite. “Is
this some kind of secret ploy? Burning food for ten years and only eating Chef
Boyardee, and then suddenly being able to cook?”
“It passed inspection, I suppose?” He
laughed.
“Sure as hell did. This is so good.
You should cook away from the back of the boxes more often.”
“Only if it’s for you.”
Riley nearly choked on her food at the
comment. She hadn’t expected something sweet to come out of his mouth. Sure it
was corny as hell, but at least he tried.
They finished their dinner in silence,
neither one knowing what to say next.
“Want to go for a walk?” Nick asked
once they both had finished eating.
“Sure.” She stood, up, stacking his
plate onto hers.
“Leave it. I’ll get it later.” He held
out his hand, which she took gratefully, as he led her off the dock and onto
the beach.
“So how much help did you get from the
guys?” She teased.
“I’m offended. You don’t think I could
pull of something like that by myself?”
“I know you’re pretty good at charming
the ladies, but honestly, you had help didn’t you?”
“AJ might’ve helped a bit.”
She chuckled to herself. “It was nice,
though. Thank you.”
They walked to the pier and back
before stopping. Riley sat down in the sand and tugged at Nick’s arm to pull
him down.
“Sit.”
“Yes ma’am.”
“I can’t believe how deserted it is
out here tonight. It’s such a pretty night…well, besides the storm coming in.”
She nodded towards the water where lightning could be seen in the
distance. “What’d you do? Pay them off?”
“Yeah… couldn’t believe how expensive
they were,” He winked. “So..”
“Here we go again.” She laughed. “This
is still so damn awkward.”
“Tell me about it. You’d think it’d be
easier…”
“We always did make everything
difficult.”
“True.” He moved closer, looking
up at her sheepishly. “Can I?”
“I don’t know, can you?” She teased,
an attempt to lift the tension.
He leaned in, cupping her face into
his hands. Just as their lips met, rain began to fall.
“Figures.” She muttered.
“Screw it.” He mumbled, allowing their
lips to meet again.
“We’re going to get sick.” She said
minutes later, pulling away from his grasps.
“I don’t care.” He reached for the
bottom of her tank top and pulled it up over her arms before pushing her down
to the sand. Returning the favor, she quickly unbuttoned his shirt and pulled
the damp material from his skin. Her hands worked quickly as she moved them down
and fumbled with his belt buckle. Finally unhooking it, she slid it off from
around his waist and tossed it above their heads.
He slid his hands beneath the
waistband of her capris as she grabbed the zipper to his khakis. As she pulled
it down, he suddenly stopped. Panicked, he sat up quickly and zipped his pants
back up.
“What’s wrong?”
“We can’t do this. I can’t do this.
I’m so sorry, Riley. I didn’t mean to-“
“Calm down. What are you talking
about?” She picked her tank top up off the sand and brushed it off before
trying to cover herself.
“Do you realize how close we were?” He
stood up, grabbing his shirt and slipping it back on. “I could’ve infected
you.”
“Nick, we wouldn’t have let it gone
that far.”
“But what if it happened? God damnit.”
He kicked sand as he began walking down the beach, away from her. She could
tell from the way he spoke that he was near tears. She watched as his dark
figure finally stopped, sitting down roughly on the sand. His head rested on
his knees as his shoulders visibly shook.
Pulling her tank top back over her
head, she stood up and walked towards him. The rain continued to fall down
around them, but was hardly felt. Hesitating, Riley sat down beside him.
“Sorry for walking away.” He attempted
to wipe his face with the back of his hand, only to have it splashed with
raindrops.
“It’s okay,” She said softly.
“It’s just that… I’m so fucking tired
of this damn disease. I don’t want to feel sorry for myself but everything in
my life has had to change. I have to stop and think about what I do before I do
anything. I have to act like a baby over a fucking paper cut just so I don’t
lose a drop of blood somewhere. I lost one of my best friends because of it.
And now, I can’t even have sex without thinking twice, and even then, I could
still infect someone. I’m never even going to be able to get married because no
one is going to want to risk their life with me.” He sighed after his spiel,
thankful to let it out.
“Nick, if they love you like someone
should love you, it won’t matter what’s wrong with you. It won’t matter that
they’re at risk.”
“That’s the thing. No one will love me
because of it.”
“Think again.”
“What?” He looked up at her, confused
by her words.
“Do you think I would have let you go
that far if I didn’t love you? Do you think I would even have let myself get
that close to you if I didn’t love you? HIV is just a hump in life, okay? We’re
all going to die someday. I could get hit by a bus tomorrow. I don’t give a
flying fuck how close I get to you, Nick. Sure we have to take proper
precautions, but I’m not going to let HIV stop me from loving you like I do.”
Nick stared in awe before turning his
focus to the water.
“Are you okay?” She asked, trying to
read the emotions on his face.
Leaning over, he pulled her into a
tight hug. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“Being here. Being my friend. Letting
me love you. And loving me.” Tears burned her eyes as she pulled away from the
hug, cupping his face into her hands and kissing him tenderly. “Now we should
probably get inside before we get struck by lightning.”
He nodded, standing up before helping
her up. He clasped his hand around hers and led her towards the house.
“I’ll get the stuff from the dock in
the morning.” He said as they walked up the stairs to the deck. As they entered
the house, he flipped the light switch on but nothing happened.
“I do believe we lost power,” Riley
said, closing the door behind them.
“Thank you captain obvious.” He
laughed as she elbowed him.
Opening a nearby drawer, he drew out a
flashlight and handed it to her.
“Go change and meet me in my room.”
“Yes sir.” She turned the light on and
roamed through the dark house to her room. Nick padded down the hallway behind
her, stepping into his room. He shuffled around in a drawer in the bathroom and
found several candles. Setting them in the room, he found a lighter in the
bedside drawer and lit them.
In the candlelight, he changed into a
pair of shorts and t-shirt before climbing beneath the comforter of his bed. A
few minutes later, he heard footsteps in the hallway and Riley appeared in the
doorway.
“You didn’t make the power go out on
purpose, did you?” She wriggled her eyebrows at him as she climbed into the bed
beside him.
“Geesh, no. Like the hot tub wouldn’t
be more entertaining right now.”
“Nick!” She slapped his arm.
“Pervert.”
Turning into her stomach, she leaned
onto her elbows and stared at him.
“What?” He asked, turning to his side.
“Nothing.”
“Why are you looking at me then?”
“Because I can.”
And for the rest of the night, the
playful banter continued along with long, serious talks about life. By
daylight, Riley lay within Nick’s arm, a smile drawn on her face through her
sound sleep. Nick woke early, confused at first, and then remembered the night
before and realized she was in his arms. Snuggling down into the blankets, he
pulled her closer; thankful he had someone like her in his life.
I would give up everything
Before I’d separate myself from you
After so much suffering
I finally found unvarnished truth
I was all by myself
For the longest time
So cold inside
And the hurt from the heartache
Would not subside
I felt like dying
Until you saved my life
Thank God I found you
I was lost without you
My every wish and every dream
Somehow became reality
When you brought the sunlight
Completed my whole life
I’m overwhelmed with gratitude
My baby, I’m so thankful
I found you
(Lyrics are from “Thank God
I Found You” by Mariah Carey)
***
