Part 27:
I
Owe It To Myself
Nick stood staring off
into the distance, thinking about Howie’s wedding and the birth of Kevin’s son,
Brian Thomas, almost a month later.
He smiled when he thought
back to the christening ceremony, in which he was named little Brian’s godfather.
He knew he would never forget the moment
when the baby had been placed in his unsure arms.
Cradling the warm little
body against his chest, Nick was trying desperately to concentrate on not
dropping the infant, when, suddenly, he felt its tiny little hand curl around
his finger.
Looking down, he was met
by a pair of familiar blue-gray eyes, staring up at him with all the trust in
the world.
Like they’d met some place
before.
***
The afternoon of the
christening, he’d gone back to Kevin’s house, making himself comfortable in the
guest house with his feet on the coffee table, a beer in his hand.
“You decent?” Kevin
shouted, throwing open the front door and strolling inside, his son cradled in
his arms.
“What if I hadn’t been
decent?” Nick asked, looking at the beer in his hand and wondering if he should
be drinking in front of a minor.
“Then I would have covered
my eyes.” Kevin shifted the baby around,
digging in his pocket and pulling out a lavender envelope that he thrust in
Nick’s face. “I thought you might like
to see this,” he said, as Nick set the beer on the coffee table and reached for
the envelope.
Opening the flap, he
pulled out a single sheet of crisp vellum and read the dark violet, swirling
lettering.
You have cordially been invited to attend the
wedding of Miss Leighanne Wallace to Mr. Patrick Sanderson…
Nick didn’t need to read
any further. Tapping the invitation on his knee, he glanced
up at Kevin.
“Are you going to go?”
“Fuck no, I’m not going to
go. I can’t believe she has the gall to
even invite me.”
“What, she doesn’t deserve
to be happy?” Nick asked.
“Don’t start with me,
Nicky.” Kevin turned, heading for the
door.
***
Nick stepped onto the
veranda of the Hilton Head Country Club, a glass of champagne in one hand, as
he scanned the sea of happy faces for Leighanne. He finally found her sitting alone on a stone
bench, overlooking the eleventh hole green, a winsome look on her face.
“Hey there, lady,” Nick
said in his most suave voice.
Glancing up, Leighanne
smiled. “Nick Carter.”
“The one and only.”
“I can’t believe you came.”
Scooting over, she patted the bench
beside her, taking the glass of champagne from Nick’s hands as he sat down.
“You look beautiful.” Nick smiled, taking in her elegant, off-white,
strapless gown that showed off her dark tan and golden hair.
“You don’t look so bad
yourself.” She reached out,
straightening the crooked bow tie on his tux. “But you still can’t get your bow tie straight.”
They both laughed at the
memories of her wedding to Brian, when Nick had stumbled into almost every
picture, slightly drunk, his bow tie always askew.
“I didn’t think any of you
would come.” She went on sipping from
his glass of champagne.
“Well, you were wrong.” Nick could see Patrick gazing over the sea of
faces for his new bride. “So what about
this Patrick? Is he a good guy?” Nick
asked.
Leighanne smiled at the
mention of her new husband’s name. “Yes,
he’s a very good guy. And he loves me
very much.”
“And do you love him?” As Nick asked the question, Patrick finally
caught Leighanne’s eye.
“Yes, Nick.” Her eyes sparkled, as the bride and groom
shared a moment with one another across the room. “Yes, I love him very much.” There was a moment of silence before she spoke
again. “I’m not going to apologize for
being happy, for going on with my life, Nick.”
“Nobody asked you to,
Leighanne.”
She smiled, a single tear
winding its way down her cheek, as the sounds of “Crazy” by Pasty Cline drifted
through the air.
Standing, Nick took the
glass of champagne from Leighanne and set it on the bench beside her.
“Leighanne Sanderson, may
I have this dance?” he asked, reaching for her trembling hand.
“Yes, Nick… yes, you may.”
***
“Hey Nick, you about done
there?” Kevin called out, shaking Nick from his daydream.
“Yeah, buddy,” Howie cut
in. “We were thinking about going back
to Kevin’s place, kicking back with a couple of cold beers-”
“Or water,” A.J. jumped in
with a laugh.
“Or water, and reminiscing
about the good old days.”
“Um yeah, I’ll be right
there,” Nick called out, digging in his back pocket for his wallet. “Just give me a second.”
Standing back from the
grave, Nick realized that he hadn’t said anything to Brian.
“It’s been a pretty shitty
year, Bri,” he began. “There are days
when everything seems to go right and I can’t imagine anything different, and
then there are other days when I still find myself just wanting to let go.”
Glancing back over his
shoulder at Kevin, A.J., and Howie, he smiled, as Kevin reached for A.J., putting
him in a playful headlock as Howie looked on, a sparkle in his eye.
“But I’m not going to let
go, Brian. Not today, anyway. You wanted me to live, so that’s what I’m
going to try and do. I owe it to the
guys, I owe it to my godson, and I guess I owe it to myself to stay alive.”
Flipping open the billfold
of his wallet, he pulled out the picture of Mo.
The image had faded over
time of the man who had turned his world upside down. The sharp edges and menacing glare had given
away to a soft gray haze that no longer seemed threatening.
“This is your reality now, Nick… are you scared?”
Shredding the picture of
Mo, Nick held it in the palm of his hands as a breeze caught the pieces,
scattering them into the warm, summer air, mixing with the white blossoms that
rained down from the tree overhead.
“Hey Carter, you coming?” A.J.
shouted, as he, Kevin, and Howie began to walk down the hill.
“Yeah, I’m coming!” Nick
shouted, glancing up at the blue sky, a smile on his face.
Damn, it was a beautiful
day, and he was going to make the most of it.
THE END
