Chapter
50
Jackie
immediately looked up from the magazine article she was reading when she heard
a soft whimper come from the now shaking figure in the bed. She threw down her
magazine and rushed over to the side of the bed, gathering the sobbing, shaking
body of her son’s best friend into her arms.
“What’s wrong
Nicky honey? Are you ok?” she asked as she pushed his damp blond hair away from
his forehead.
“Why don’t you
hate me, like everyone else does?” Nick whimpered as he started to sob again.
“Who hates you
Nick? I could never hate you, you have a kind soul, honey. No one in their
right mind could hate you.”
“But I killed
Harry, Jackie. He died and it is my entire fault. I was the reason he was out
driving that night when he himself was on the brink of exhaustion. If I
wouldn’t have left in the first place, none of this would have happened.”
“Nick it isn’t
your fault! I don’t blame you and neither do Harry’s father and I know that
Brian forgave you when you came back from LA. He was so happy you came back
Nick, you can’t think that you coming back was a mistake. We are all glad you
came back.”
“But that
magazine said…” Nick started to say but was interrupted when Jackie put a
finger to his lips to silence him.
“That magazine
is full of rubbish, Nickolas Carter. They print anything to sell copies, even
if what they print is mostly lies. They don’t care who they hurt so long they
find a hot story and print it and sell it. We all here know the truth and the
truth is nothing that happened is your fault. We all believe it, but you have
to believe it yourself, Nick.”
Nick looked up
into the eyes of his best friend’s mother and gave her a small smile as he
wiped his eyes. “How do you forgive so easily?” he asked sheepishly.
Jackie just
smiled and laid Nick’s head down on the pillows and straightened out the
blankets as she put them over his body and tucked him in. She smiled as Nick
reached for her hand and she took his hand in hers, squeezing it slightly.
“Well let me tell you a story, Nick,” she said as she got comfortable. She gave
him a small smile and started to tell her story.
“Mommy!!
Look how fast I can run!” five-year-old Brian yelled with excitement as he ran
as fast as his small legs would carry him.
“You can’t
run as fast as me!” eight-year-old Harold boasted and he ducked behind a tree
that was at the edge of the sidewalk at his grandparent’s home outside of
Lexington, Kentucky.
Jackie
smiled at her children as she turned and walked towards the porch where her
husband and his parents were conversing. All of a sudden she stopped in her
tracks when she heard the angry yell of her oldest son and the loud crying of
her youngest. She spun around and was greeted by the sight of her youngest son
lying on his back on the sidewalk crying loudly as his older brother looked
down at him with fear and shock in his eyes, and maybe guilt?
Jackie ran
over to the sobbing child lying on the sidewalk and scooped him gently into her
arms, running towards her husband who now stood at the bottom of the porch
steps. She placed her son into her husband’s open arms and began to look over her
baby, checking for any visible signs of injury. “You ok, baby?” she asked as
she gently pushed his blond hair back and gave him a kiss on his forehead. Her
heart sank as she seen Brian shake his head. “What’s wrong?” she asked with
worry in her voice.
“My head
hurts, mommy,” he said quietly as he reached behind him and began to rub the
back of his head. Jackie found herself looking up at her husband with worry.
“Let’s take
him to the hospital to make sure nothing is wrong,” he said as he shifted
Brian’s position in his arms to make him more comfortable.
“Ok,”
Jackie whispered as she took her baby from her husband’s arms and walked
towards the car, opening the door and sitting down inside. She waited patiently
as her husband explained the situation to his parents and suddenly felt guilty
when her husband walked over to his visibly upset son and gave him a hug as he
picked him up and carried him to the car. Jackie gently placed Brian in the
backseat with his brother and waited impatiently as they made their way to the
hospital. The whole time she was hoping it was something as simple as a
concussion, but deep inside she had a bad feeling that it was something more.
***
Hours later
her and her husband and son waited in the waiting room, just moments after the
doctor had determined her son had a concussion and something worse as she had
feared, a staph infection that would most likely take his life.
“What
happened Harry?” she asked as she looked at her soon who looked down at the
floor guiltily.
He shifted
in his seat uncomfortably and whispered, “He made me mad, Mommy, and I pushed
him down.”
“Why did
you do that Harry? Because you pushed him down, Brian is fighting for his
life!” Jackie exclaimed before she could control her anger. Before she could
apologize, she watched sadly as her son ran out of the waiting room with tears
streaming down his face. “What did I just do, Harold? How could I have yelled
at him like that?” she asked her husband. He shrugged and looked down the hall.
“You should
go look for him, I have a good idea where he is at,” he said quietly. Jackie
nodded and got up from her seat and walked down the hall of the children’s ward
of the hospital. Moments later she approached the partly closed door of her
son’s hospital bed and looked insider. Her eyes filled with tears at the sight
before her. Harry was gripping his baby brother’s hand tightly, begging for
forgiveness.
“I’m sorry,
Brian. I didn’t mean to push you down like that. It is my fault you are sick,
even Mommy thinks so. Now I don’t think Mommy loves me anymore.”
Jackie
gasped as she watched Brian open his eyes and whisper the words in which she
had to lean forward to hear “I forgive you Harry, and Mommy does love you.”
“Mrs.
Littrell?,” a voice behind here asked softly. She jumped and turned, coming
face to face with her son’s doctor, Dr. Hall.
“Yes?,” she
whispered, fearing that the doctor would have more bad news for her.
“I just
wanted to say that your son is very lucky,” the doctor began.
“Lucky? How
can he be lucky, he is dying!” Jackie thought as she looked at the doctor in
confusion.
“If your
son hadn’t been brought in, he would have suffered a lot more than he is now.
He still would have passed on, but now he won’t die suffering as much as he
would have if he hadn’t been brought in.” the doctor finished explaining.
Jackie
nodded as she looked into the room at her children, “Thank you doctor,” she
whispered as she quietly entered the room, being as quiet as possible so she
wouldn’t wake Brian who had just fallen asleep again. She bent down over her
oldest son and took his small hand in hers and looked in his teary blue eyes.
“Thank you,
baby,” she said. She smiled as her son looked at her in confusion.
She began
to quietly explain what the doctor had told her moments before outside the room
and apologized for her earlier actions. Harry nodded tearfully at the end of
her explanation and threw his arms around his mother’s neck. “You’re welcome,
Mommy. I love you and of course I forgive you,” he said. Jackie smiled at her
son, thankful that he had found it in his heart to forgive, for this was the
event that had changed her outlook on life; forever.
***
Nick smiled at
Jackie and gave her a hug using his uninjured arm. “Thank you for forgiving,”
he said. Jackie smiled back at the young man as she returned his hug and was
about to reply when a hasty knock at the door was heard. She looked towards the
door and was shocked to see Dr. Adele rush into the room. Before she could ask
if anything was wrong, Dr. Adele approached Nick’s bedside and urgently said, “
Mrs. Littrell, you are needed in the ICU unit immediately.”