Chapter 23
Caroline
yawned as she poured herself a steaming cup of freshly made coffee. It
was
She yawned
again and decided that she would let them sleep a while longer. After
all, they most likely went to bed much later than she did. She cleared
the table after devouring her breakfast and moved into the foyer. I
think I'll go for a stroll in the woods. With a content smile, she
slipped on her boots and winter coat and stepped out into the nippy morning,
unaware of the disaster awaiting her when she returned...
***
"Doesn't
it feel good to be going home where you belong?"
Katarina ignored Kris and his wretchedly cheerful voice and stared out the
window at the billowy clouds beneath her, wondering when her tears would stop
raining down her pale cheeks. They'd been in the air for three hours now
and with each mile flown, the further Nick was...
And the more
miserable she became.
God she'd
never felt so much pain...
Nick...it's
only been three hours and I already feel like I can't go on without you... The tears
continued to stream out of her eyes like overflowing waterfalls. If
you only knew that I didn't have a choice... She let out a tiny
whimper.
"Would
you quit your damn weeping?!" Kris hissed in her ear suddenly, "it's
downright pathetic!"
"Leave me
alone," Katarina mumbled furiously without
looking at him, "you forced me go with you...so you can PUT UP with my
MOOD!"
And then she
felt his hand on her thigh.
"I can
think of plenty of ways to get your mind off Nicky."
"GET YOUR
HANDS OFF ME!!!!!" Katarina bellowed and whirled
around to face him with her vision blurred by yet unshed tears. Kris
stared at her in shock while everyone turned to stare at them in blatant
curiosity. Normally, she'd be embarrassed beyond belief. Today, she
couldn't care less. She didn't care about anything anymore.
A stewardess
approached them cautiously. "Uh, is everything all right?"
Katarina moved her gaze back to the window once again. She could feel
Kris's eyes burning into her back.
"Everything
is fine," he growled.
She leaned her
head against the window pane and let out a dismal sigh.
Nothing would
ever be 'fine' for her again.
***
"So this
is it, isn't it?"
Howie looked
at Billie and felt like his world was about to crash down over him. They
were at the airport waiting for the plane to take her back to
Billie looked
at him, her eyes glazed by emotions he felt in his heart. "Neither
do I..." She reached out and caressed his cheek. "Last
night was..."
He groaned
inwardly. Only one word could describe last night.
Heaven.
Being in her
arms...touching her...feeling her... It had been heaven. And now
she was going away...
Funny, it all
seemed to make logical sense last night. After hours of bodily bliss,
they looked into each other's eyes and knew that their 'friendship' could not
continue. They had crossed the line...tempted fate...and now it was too
late to go back. Neither of them wanted to go back. And so they
agreed.
They would
never see each other again after their only night together...a night in which
they'd discovered so much more than just wanting... It was the right
thing to do.
So why did it
feel so damn wrong?!
"Billie,
can you promise me something?"
"Anything."
He wiped the
stray tear from her cheek. "Don't you ever regret last
night...because I know that I won't. Not for one single moment."
She pulled him
into a tight embrace. "I promise I won't Howie."
He returned
her embrace with everything he felt and planted a light kiss on her neck and
let go.
"Flight
345 from
She grabbed
her carry on bag and gave him one more wistful look before turning away.
She gave her ticket and walked through the gate.
Howie watched
her until she disappeared from sight.
***
"You
know, you were right about having a strong stomach Kev," A.J grimaced
while tapping an unlit cigarette on the coffee table in his living room.
"It was disgusting watching Rachel hang onto you like a damn
mosquito."
"Yeah,
well, at least you're not being seduced by her," Kevin muttered,
repugnance on his face. Rachel had tried, yet again, to get him into bed
last night.
He'd rather
throw himself at a pack of wolves.
The sound of
two feminine voices wafted into the living room suddenly and Kevin's heart
immediately quickened it's pace. A.J patted his back and stood to meet
Sarah and Kristin.
"Hey
Kristin, give A.J a hug!"
She managed a
mild laugh. "Hi A.J."
It was a
friendly hug, but Kevin had never been more envious of A.J than he was at this
very moment. Her eyes fell on his then. God she was
beautiful. He ached to take her in his arms and hold her...
If only her
gaze wasn't so cold.
"We'll
leave you two alone," Sarah took her fiancé's hand and led him toward the
door.
A.J turned his
head long enough to meet Kevin's gaze. 'Good luck' he mouthed.
Kevin nodded
his thanks and then focused his eyes on Kristin. "Hi."
She took the seat
across from him and crossed her arms and legs. "Hello," she
replied coolly.
He took a deep
breath. "Kris, you have to know what's going on."
She shook her
head. "I don't want to know anything. Not anymore."
"You
don't understand baby. I--"
"What's
there to understand Kevin?! You broke our vows!! It doesn't get
much simpler than that!!"
"Dammit," Kevin stood, "I didn't break any of our
vows Kristin! EVER!!"
"I SAW
YOU!!! FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, I SAW YOU!!!"
"JUST
LISTEN TO ME KRIS!!" He willed his voice to calm down.
"Please, just listen okay?"
After a moment
of uncertainty, she nodded tersely. "Okay."
He launched
quickly into his story, explaining every last detail that he could
remember. In truth, he didn't have concrete proof that he hadn't broken
his vows to his wife, but somehow, he knew that he didn't. It had
taken Brian's questions for him to finally listen to his gut. Something
was not right. And he had to figure out why and fast. When he
finished, Kristin stared at him with an intensity that normally would be
gratifying...
"I don't
know Kevin..."
"Kris,
you know me. I'd never do anything to hurt you!"
By now, she
was softly weeping and taking a chance, he moved to sit next to her. When
she didn't move, he thanked God and reached out and gently cupped her face.
She gazed at
him. "I want to believe that what you're saying is true Kevin...that
you were tricked in some way by her..."
"Then do
believe it honey. Give me time to find out the truth." Finding
more courage, he lightly grazed her lips, causing his blood to warm up
profoundly. "Please...just give me...give us...some
time."
Her eyes,
which had closed when his lips came into contact with hers, slowly opened again
and locked with his. "All right."
***
Nick whistled
happily while putting the finishing touches on Katarina's
breakfast. He put the scrambled eggs on the plate next to the bacon, hash
browns, and toast and grinned. He wasn't the greatest cook to ever walk
the planet, but he didn't do a bad job this time around. He was certain
she'd love it. He put the heaping plate on a tray followed by a glass of
freshly squeezed orange juice and lifted it. Carefully, he ascended up
the stairs, praying that he didn't drop it all on the floor. He'd worked
too hard at doing something special for his girl and he didn't want it ruined
because of butterfingers.
He stopped at
her door and knocked. "Rina? It's
me...good morning!" His cheerful grin wavered slightly when she
didn't answer. "Rina?" Maybe she's
still sleeping... Juggling the tray with one hand he opened the door,
hoping that she was fully clothed...well...he wouldn't mind if she wasn't...but
that was beside the point...
But as soon as
he stepped inside, his smile contorted to a worried frown.
Katarina was not in her bed.
Where did
she go?
He set the tray down on her nightstand and looked around the room. His
heart began to pound in uneasiness. Everything looked so...vacant.
Wary, he moved toward her closet. Taking a deep breath, he opened
it. Nothing was there except empty hangers. No...it couldn't
be...she must've moved her clothes somewhere else... He whirled
around and quickly scanned the room. No clothes in sight...and no
suitcase either. And then he spotted the white envelope on her pillow.
His body filled
with dread.
Hesitantly,
Nick sat on her bed and picked it up. Why did he have such a bad
feeling? It was only a letter...and yet, he felt as though his life was
about to change...and not for the better. With slightly trembling hands,
he tore the envelope open, pulled out the piece of paper and unfolded it...
Nick,
By the time
you'll be reading this, I'll be on a plane back to
Please
don't be angry with me Nicky. I had to do what was right. For
you. Maybe someday, you'll understand. And no matter where I am,
please know that I'm always thinking of you and your smiling face. Don't
forget to smile Nicky...and laugh too. Smile and laugh when you think of
me, when you think of us and those special moments we shared. I'll try to
do the same, even though my heart is heavy without you.
With all my love,
Rina
For a long
time, he didn't move...no blinking...no twitching... He just stared
blankly at nothing, feeling himself slowly shut down...fade away... She
left me...she never cared about me... His heart tore in two.
She never
loved me!
And that's
when he snapped.
In a rage, he
ripped the letter in half, shoved her gourmet meal off the tray and stormed
downstairs. He marched into the living room and spotted the tree...their
tree...
Their damn
tree!
"RINA!!!!!"
He stalked toward it and ignoring the pine needles that drilled into his hands,
he threw it across the room and it smashed against Caroline's paintings, which
fell to the floor in a heap. "DAMN DAMN DAMN!!!!!!" Not through yet, he hurled himself
into the damaged tree and tore off branches, ornaments, tinsel...anything he
could get his hands on, hardly caring about the blood gushing from his wounded
fingers.
And once he
realized that he had destroyed his only connection to his beloved, he exploded
in tears and sobbed uncontrollably. This was exactly what he was afraid
of. He put his trust in her...he fell for her...he bought every word...he
LOVED her for crying out loud! His eyes hardened although the tears kept
flowing.
He'd never
forgive her for deserting him.
And he'd never
forgive himself for believing.
***
