~
Lying close
to you, feeling your heart beating
And I
wonder what you’re dreaming
Wonder if
it’s me you’re seeing
Then I kiss
your eyes and thank God we’re together
I just
wanna stay with you in this moment forever
~
Six months
later
I stood backstage in the circle, my head bowed in prayer. That night would kick-off our fall tour for
our latest album. Not only was I
psyched about the first concert; I had something else to be happy about. Someone, actually.
Keeping my head down, I squeezed Grace’s hand. Grace and I had been dating for half a year
now, and so of course, I had invited her to tour with us, and she had
accepted. I was thrilled to have her
there with me.
She had moved in with me three months earlier, so we had been
seeing each other all the time, and we both knew that we couldn’t go three
months away from each other while I was on tour.
“Amen,” we all said, when the prayer was over, lifting our
heads. The group quickly dispersed, our
opening act getting ready to go on stage, the dancers going to warm up one last
time.
I kissed Grace. “You better
go get your seat,” I said. “I’ll see you
when the show’s over.”
She smiled. “Okay, honey,”
she said. “Good luck.”
“Thanks,” I replied. “Enjoy
the show.” I went to join Nick, Kevin,
Howie, and AJ, and Grace went with a security guard to her front row seat.
***
Almost two hours later, we were in the middle of our concert. We sat down on stools on the stage, while the
band began to play the opening of “How Did I Fall in Love With You”. That was one of my favorite songs that we
sang. It was such a beautiful song, and
Howie had done an awesome job with the lyrics.
Every time we sang it, it reminded me of Grace. And this time was no exception.
As I began to sing, I didn’t close my eyes, like I usually
did. Instead, I looked out into the
audience and down into the front row, where my Grace stood, smiling up at
me. I looked straight into her eyes, and
I sang.
Remember
when we never needed each other
The best of
friends, like sister and brother
We
understood we’d never be alone
Grace smiled wider, her eyes glimmering. Was she crying? It was hard to tell. Either way, I knew she was touched by the
song and its message.
The whole song, I never took my eyes off her. As we cut off on the last night, the
audience’s screams rang out, but I blocked them from my mind. All my sense were focused on one thing –
Grace, the love of my life.
***
After the concert that night, we went bowling to celebrate a great
night, as we often did after our shows.
Grace and I sat together at a table, sipping chocolate shakes,
while the others took their turns.
“I love you, Brian,” she said suddenly.
I smiled in surprise. “I
love you too,” I replied.
“Thanks for bringing me with you on tour. I don’t think I could have gone so long
without being with you.”
“I know. I couldn’t go that
long without you either,” I replied.
“Hey, cut out the sappy stuff, you guys. Bri, you’re up,” said Nick, suddenly
appearing beside our table.
I rolled my eyes. “Coming,”
I told him, getting up from my seat and going down to the lane to take my
turn. I grabbed my ball and bowled it
straight down the lane. It hit the pins
just right and knocked them all over.
“Whoo hoo!” I whooped, gloating at Nick. “You gotten a strike yet, Nicky?”
“Shut up, Frick,” Nick said, sticking his tongue out at me.
“Grace, you’re up,” Howie said, glancing at the computer screen
that held our scores on it.
“Great,” she muttered, getting her ball. I snickered as I watched her get ready to
roll the ball. Grace was a pitiful
bowler. She let go of the ball, and
sure enough, it rolled right off the lane and into the gutter.
“No fair,” she pouted. “How
come I suck so bad at this?”
I laughed. “Hey, don’t
worry, you’re not much worse than Frack here is,” I said, slinging my arm
around Nick’s shoulders.
Nick laughed and then suddenly realized he was being made fun
of. “Hey!” he cried, shoving my arm off
of him.
Grace burst out laughing, and the rest of us joined her, laughing
at Nick until his face turned red and he stalked off to his table to sulk.
The other guys took their turns, and soon it was my turn
again. “Okay, Gracie, watch the master,”
I said, grabbing my ball. As I started
to roll it down the lane, Nick came up from behind me and gave me a light
shove. The ball fell from my fingers,
landing on the wooden lane with a thud and quickly rolling into the gutter,
while I slipped on my bowling shoes and landed with another thud right on my
butt.
From behind me, I heard a chorus of hysterical laughing start
up. I got up, grunting, and turned
around, my eyes shooting daggers at Nick.
“Ooh, you’ll pay for that, Carter,” I threatened, while he just grinned
devilishly at me.
Grace laughed and got her ball to take her turn.
“Here, let me show you how it’s done,” I said, following her to
the edge of the lane.
“Psh, like you’re any good either, Mr. Gutter Ball,” she giggled,
grinning at Nick.
“Aw, shut up, you know I rule.
Frack’s just jealous of my talent.”
Grace laughed, and I stood behind her, taking her arm to guide her in
the right way to bowl. As I started to
guide her arm back, she turned her head back, her lips meeting mine in a sudden
kiss.
I let go of her arm to wrap my arms around her from behind
me. But she wasn’t expecting that, and
as I let go, her arm fell with the weight of the ball. The ball slipped from her fingers and fell
with a thud.
“OW!!!” Grace screamed.
I leaped back, realizing with horror that the ball had landed
right on her foot. “Oh, my God, Grace,
are-“
“Shit!” she cried, collapsing to the ground and grabbing her
foot. “Oh, my God, it hurts!”
The other guys came running.
“Do you think it’s broken?” Howie asked, looking at Grace in concern.
“I don’t know,” she wailed.
“It hurts like a bitch though!”
“Come here,” Kevin said, bending over and gently picking her
up. He carried her over to a bench and
sat her down. “Can you take your shoe
off for me? We need to look at it. We might have to take you to the hospital.”
Grace painfully managed to take her bowling shoe and sock
off. Her foot was already swelling and
turning black and blue.
“Can you move it?” I asked her.
She tried, gritting her teeth in pain. “I can’t,” she cried. “It hurts too much.”
“Come on, guys, we need to take her to the emergency room to get
this checked out. It might be broken,”
Kevin said.
One of our security guards went to find the bus drivers, who
brought our two tour buses up to the front of the bowling alley.
Another guard picked up Grace in his huge, muscular arms and
carried her out to one of the buses, while the rest of us grabbed our stuff and
followed. AJ, Howie, and Kevin got onto
one bus, while Nick and I got on the other bus with Grace.
Then the buses pulled away, taking us to the nearest hospital.
***
An hour later, we were sitting in the emergency room, watching a
doctor wrap Grace’s foot in a cast.
“You’ll need to stay off this for at least six weeks while the
bones heal,” he told her.
She nodded miserably.
”You okay, sweetie?” I asked, squeezing her hand.
“I’m fine,” she muttered.
“Just embarrassed. This has to be
one of the stupidest things I’ve ever done.”
I laughed. “Don’t worry, we
don’t have to tell anyone else how it happened,” I said. “We can say you were trampled by rabid
fans. People would believe that.”
She smiled. “Yeah, that’s a
good one.”
“Okay, I’m going to let this plaster dry, and I’ll be back in a
little bit with some crutches for you,” the doctor said, leaving the room.
“This sucks. I can’t
believe this,” Grace said, sighing.
“Do you want to stay on tour with us, or would you rather go
home?” I asked her. “Cause I dunno if
you wanna travel everywhere on crutches, with a broken foot. If you want to go-“
“No, I wanna stay,” she interrupted. “I’ll be fine. Most of the time is spent sitting in the bus
anyway.”
I smiled, relieved.
“Okay,” I said. “I’m glad. I just don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”
She shrugged. “I’d be worse
off all alone at home. I’d rather be
here with you.”
I smiled and gave her a hug.
“I’d rather have you here with me too,” I told her.
A few minutes later, the doctor came back, hauling a pair of
crutches with him. “Here, why don’t you
try these,” he said. He helped Grace
off the table she was lying on and gave her the crutches. She gingerly hobbled around the room on
them.
“You think you can manage?” the doctor asked.
“Yeah. I just have to get
used to them,” she replied. “I’ve never
been on crutches before.”
“You’ll be fine with some practice,” the doctor said. “Here, I just need you to sign these forms,
and then you can be on your way.”
I helped Grace sit back down on the table to sign the forms. When she was done, I walked slowly alongside
her while she made her way out of the room and towards the waiting room, where
the others were sitting.
“Hey, Grace,” AJ said, eyeing the crutches and the cast on her
foot. “So it was broken?”
“Yup,” she replied, smiling sheepishly. “Never drop a bowling ball on your
foot. Not fun.”
AJ laughed. “Reminds me of
when I got my foot run over by our van.
I had to tour on crutches for awhile too.”
“That had to suck,” Grace said.
“It did,” AJ laughed.
“You ready to go?” Kevin asked, standing up.
“Yup, we’re ready,” I replied.
The others got up, and we all walked slowly out to the buses.
***
Later that night, I was getting ready for bed in our hotel room,
while Grace lay in bed, her foot propped up on a pillow.
“How’s your foot feeling?” I asked her.
“It’s kind of achy,” she said.
“I took some Tylenol, but it hasn’t kicked in yet.”
“Aw. Well, try to go to
sleep. That’ll help.” I finished changing and climbed into bed with
her, shutting off the light.
We lay in silence for a few minutes. I was exhausted, but Grace kept fidgeting.
“What’s wrong?” I asked her finally.
“I can’t get comfortable with this stupid thing,” she muttered,
referring to her foot. “It hurts if I
try to turn on my side, and I can’t sleep on my back like this.”
I scooted closer to her and put my arm around her so that her head
rested against my shoulder. She
snuggled up close to me and draped her arm around me.
“That better?” I asked.
”Yeah,” she said contentedly. “I love
you.”
“Love you too,” I replied.
“This reminds me of that night of our first kiss,” Grace said
suddenly. I could tell she was smiling,
just by her voice, even though I couldn’t see her face in the dark.
I smiled too, remembering how we had kissed that night in my
bedroom, after confessing our feelings to each other. We had fallen asleep and woken up the next
morning in each other’s arms.
And now, this night, twelve years later, we would do the same.
Slowly, Grace drifted off to sleep. It was dark in the room, but the moonlight
coming through the window illuminated her face. She looked so beautiful sleeping, just as
she had back then. But she was older
now and even more beautiful, if that was possible.
I smiled contentedly, grateful to have her there in my arms. I lowered my head and kissed her very gently,
then closed my eyes and slowly went to sleep, visions of Grace filling my dreams
the whole night long.
***
Lyrics
taken from Aerosmith’s “I Don’t Wanna Miss a Thing”