Chapter 19
Gracie stood just outside the door, where her sister lay
awake. She didn’t know if she should go in or not, she was afraid of what she
may hear from her. She wasn’t quite sure if she had heard or not but she had
the feeling she had. Not wanting to confront her after she told her what she
had, she turned the knob and walked in.
“Well I still want to run some more tests Pamela, just to
be on the safe side ok?”
“Fine, I understand, but I feel fine Dr. Calloway.” said
Pamela as she looked at her doctor in the eyes.
“I understand Pamela that you’re ready to get out of here
but, I don’t want you to feel fine I want you to feel great!” At that moment
she spotted Gracie coming into the room, “hey, Gracie I see you got my message.
Well I am sure you want to be alone with Pamela so I will leave you two alone,
Pamela I will schedule a CT scan for tomorrow ok?”
Pamela shrugged her shoulders and unwillingly nodded in
approval to Dr. Calloway. She preferred getting released but there was no
convincing her doctor about that. She smiled as she saw her little sister
walking toward her with tears in her eyes, it made her cry too.
With out permission Gracie hugged her sister, automatically
Pamela responded to her hug. Gracie took a seat beside her sister’s bed, she
didn’t know how to start, she just knew if she didn’t talk she would. “So I
guess we need to talk about everything huh?”
Pamela saw the fear and sadness in her sister’s eyes; it
broke her heart to see her like that. But, she couldn’t deny that they in fact
needed to talk, most importantly about Alex. “First of all how’s Amber taking
all of this? How is she?”
********
“DAMN traffic! **@#&*^%$##@@@** Stupid people, if you
can’t drive stay away from the highway!” said Alex as he hit the brakes of the
car. He couldn’t believe it, it was traffic hour. He sighed as he realized they
were stuck at least for an hour! He was interrupted by his mothers laugh
followed by Amber’s. “What’s so funny?”
“You having road rage!” said Amber laughing harder.
“I don’t have road rage,” responded Alex trying to not
laugh.
“Honey you do, you used all the cuss
words available in the English language!” hearing him use that language
reminded her about the olds days when she traveled with the boys Howie, Brian,
Kevin, Nick and of course Alex. They were a crazy bunch and she remembered the
arguments they had where every cuss word was mentioned between them. She sighed
as she remembered those days.
*********
She was just walking toward the waiting room when she heard
the familiar giggle coming from the elevators. Amber was here which meant that
most likely Alex was here too. She turned and smiled to them as the walked into
the hallway. “I see you guys made it.”
“Yeah, we got stuck in traffic for a while how’s my mom
doing?”
“She’s doing well, actually she just wanted to see you; I
was going to call you and see where you were.”
“Oh, ok well lets go in and see her,” she grabbed Alex’s
hand and Denise followed. But before she could go through Gracie stopped her.
“I think you should go in on your own honey she wants to
see you only.” Said Gracie as she looked down, trying to ignore Alex’s
surprised stare.
“Yeah, she’s right Amber maybe you should just go in for
now. She wants to see you; I’ll go and sit over there with Gracie and Mom. I
can wait to see her till she feels like it.” He took his hand away from Amber’s
grip and started walking toward the waiting room. He should have known better
than to think she would want to see him, but he understood really he did. She
needed time to talk to Amber he got it. But, he still got that feeling in his
stomach.
*******
She closed her eyes trying to remember what could have
caused her to wreck that day. Than she remembered and felt awful knowing that
she was the only to blame for it. She wasn’t paying attention to the road she
was to distraught. She had so many things to straighten out but, most of all
give Amber an explanation to her father and why he didn’t know anything about
her. Just as she opened her eyes she saw her gorgeous daughter come in with a
big smile.
“Hey, mom how do you feel? I missed you so much and
especially our little talks.” She walked up to her mother and gave a hug that
lasted forever to them both.
“I feel better now that you’re here with me,” said Pamela
she kissed Amber’s forehead. She had forgotten the feeling of Amber being with
her, she meant the world to her.
“Mom, I have a confession to make to you.”
“Oh, I know about Alex being here and about you both
spending time together. I am fine with it, I am actually glad that you and him
have gotten to know each other.”
“No, mom not that; I knew that you had gone to see him
before this happened to you and you both talked about me. Aunt Gracie told me
all of that, what I want to confess is that even though Alex told me everything
about how you met and why he didn’t know about me till now. I….I needed to get
an explanation from you, so just out of curiosity I went through your
things...and found your journals, pictures, CD’s, and letters. I read them all
well almost all I still have a couple to read and I want to tell you that I
don’t hate you for what you did. I love you mom and to me you are my hero; this
that happened to you made me realize how much you mean to me. What I don’t
understand is why if you loved My Father you didn’t fight to be with him? Uh,
I’m sorry mom I just didn’t know if you were coming back or not and it killed
me to not know why you suffered so much. I used to hear you cry every night
till you fell asleep and I never understood why. Now I do and mom I need you,
love you and I don’t want to lose you! I know I was not helping your situation
with my questions about my father. I am sorry mom I know I invaded your privacy
but, I needed answers…” she couldn’t continue and started to cry.
By then Pamela was crying to, Amber her daughter loved her
and did not hate her. “Honey its ok I understand and I am not mad. I knew
sooner or later I would need to tell you but, I could never get the courage
enough to tell you and you know it all. I could never hate or be mad at you
Amber you’re my reason to live….”
***
