Chapter 7

I know, oh yes, I know

That we can’t be together

But I just like to dream

Shane Roberts drove aimlessly around Lexington, his thoughts centered on his missing cousin and her children. Sienna was more than just a cousin to him, though. Since they were nearly the same age, they had done everything together when they were younger. Sienna had confided in him about anything and everything from school to boys to whatever, and he’d done the same. They’d been closer than brother and sister, and their mothers had called them twins. When he’d left the country at eighteen to take his photography to Ireland, she’d been hurt and confused by his decision to leave her behind. He’d felt guiltier when her parents had died and he hadn’t had enough money to make it back home, but she’d forgiven him. Sienna’s children had become the center of his world several months before, and not seeing them or knowing where they might be every day was killing him.

And now, Shane thought, now she’d been taken from her home, where she and her children should’ve been safe. Brian was a wreck, though if anyone were to say anything to him, he would snap at them. However, he had called Shane in the middle of the night, the day before he’d gotten the phone call from the kidnapper, and they’d talked for two hours. Brian had poured out all of his fears about his wife and children, knowing that Shane understood how he and Sienna worked. In turn, Brian had listened to Shane’s worries for his favorite cousin. It was almost comical, Shane mused, because, two years ago, he had been the reason Brian had mistakenly left Sienna. Now, they went to each other for comfort over the loss of her.

Spotting Sienna’s Flowers, Shane hastily parallel parked his car and walked up to the store. It was closed because it was after six, but Shane could see Marlena busily tidying up. She had refused to close the shop because she claimed that Sienna would complain that she hadn’t taken care of it. Watching her made Shane ache, though. They had lived together for over a year, and he’d been in love with her. He was still in love with her, Shane admitted to himself. He couldn’t get over her and didn’t think he was ever meant to. Before she had broken things off, claiming that his work, which took him all over the world for celebrity photo shoots, took him too far away from her too often, he’d planned on asking her to marry him. He still had the ring, Shane remembered. It sat on the top shelf of his closet, now, and he didn’t think he could ever give another woman what he’d wanted to give Marlena so badly.

Pushing those thoughts aside, he knocked on the window. When Marlena looked up, he saw an unreadable expression flit across her face before she moved to open the door.

“It’s closed,” she told him upon opening the door.

Shane watched her. “I know. I just—I needed to see it. Please,” he added.

Her expression softening when she understood, she stood aside and let him in. While she continued to clean up, he wandered the shop, remembering the love and care Sienna had poured into it for eight years. Marlena watched him when she thought he wouldn’t see her. She couldn’t help feeling sad for him because she knew the close relationship he had with Sienna. While she herself missed Sienna, the employer who had become a wonderful friend, she wondered how deep Shane’s pain went and how much he was able to mask. Part of her yearned to reach out to him and offer her shoulder to lean on, but she knew it would do nothing to help either of them move on from a relationship she had ended five months before.

“Can I go back to her office?” Shane asked, walking over to her. “I’ll leave after that. I promise.” He tried flashing his signature grin, one that made his emerald eyes sparkle, but couldn’t quite pull it off.

Marlena shrugged. “Go ahead. Si wouldn’t mind.” Nodding, he ran a weary hand through deep brown hair as he walked down the hallway behind the register.

Marlena watched as he disappeared into the office, then she turned and rested her forehead against a shelf full of azaleas. What was she going to do, she wondered. How could she keep her feelings, her heart on an even keel when she saw him looking so downhearted, so unhappy? Squeezing deep brown eyes shut, she took a deep breath to prevent herself from crying. She’d done all the crying she was going to do over Shane, she reminded herself. These tears, if they ever flowed, would be for Sienna, her children, and Brian.

Fifteen minutes later, she dumped the bills she’d counted and recorded from the register into a bag. Pushing her dark blonde hair out of her face, she carried the bag to put into a safe in Sienna’s office for safekeeping. However, she froze as she stepped through the doorway of the room. Shane wept, his head on Sienna’s desk. He clutched a framed photograph in his right hand. She’d never seen him like this in all the time they’d been together. He’d always been the one in control, while she could become teary and sentimental at the drop of a hat.

Marlena dropped the bag next to the desk and went around to lay a hand on his shoulder. “Shane? Talk to me, please,” she asked him.

He glanced up at her, tears running down his handsome face. “I can’t get over it,” he managed to say before sobbing again.

She pried the frame from his hand and looked down at it. It was a picture of Shane and Sienna, who had been several months pregnant with Luke, sitting by the pool Sienna and Brian owned. She looked angry with him over something and had her hands out, seeming ready to push him into the pool. His arms were raised as he grinned at her. Though she looked angry, Marlena knew that they were both happy in this picture. She smiled as she saw Brian holding the twins, who were clapping behind their mother. Her smile disappearing, she sent up another prayer to God to keep them safe and sound wherever they were.

Knowing she couldn’t hold out against his pain, Marlena put her arms around Shane as he wept for the loss of the woman who had been his closest confidante all his life. When his sobs subsided into quiet shudders, he shifted out of her arms and pressed the heels of his hands against his eyes to reduce the pressure of grief.

“Thanks,” he said, managing a small smile. “You didn’t have to do that.”

She shook her head. “If it helped you feel better, that’s all that counts.” When he looked down at his hands and sighed heavily, she took his hands in hers. “Shane, they’ll come home soon. The FBI will find whoever took them and bring Si and the babies home.”

He pulled his hands from hers and stood. Marlena tried not to feel hurt at the gesture. “You know, there’s a part of me that truly believes they’ll be brought home. But there’s still another part of me that’s afraid they’re gone. Brian feels the same way,” he added.

“Have a little faith that things will work out, Shane,” she began but he cut her off with a look.

“You know, Lena,” he began, using the nickname he’d given her when they’d been together. “In my life, I’ve loved four women—really and truly with all my heart loved four women. My mother and sister have been there from the start. So has Sienna. But she’s been taken from us in such a cruel way and I can’t sleep because I worry about her and the babies. I can’t stand to think they’re hurting or scared, but there’s nothing I can do.”

“Shane, Sienna’s a strong woman. She can and will get herself through this if for no other reason than to get her children home and out of danger,” Marlena told him.

He watched for a few moments, an unreadable expression in his eyes. “You’re the fourth woman I’ve loved, Lena. I know you don’t want to hear it now, but it’s true. In six months, I went from being the happiest, luckiest man in the world to the most miserable because I lost you and Sienna. I’d be lying to myself if I told you I wasn’t still in love with you,” he told her.

Marlena shook her head. “Shane, you know I can’t go back there again,” she began.

“I’m not asking you to go back there! I just need you to hear me out, Lena,” he said, nearly losing his patience. “I let you have your say six months ago. Now, it’s my turn. I am in love with you and have been since we met. I can’t tell you why, but it’s always been you I’ve been moving towards my whole life. You told me you couldn’t be with me because you couldn’t handle being away from me so much because my work took me all over the world. But, you never let me tell you that I’m willing to compromise, Lena. I could’ve told you that I was thinking of quitting celeb photographing to open my own photography place here, in Lexington. Hell, I bought a workspace the week before we split,” he told her and watched surprise flit across her face.

“Shane, you never told me,” she managed to say.

“Because you didn’t give me the chance to,” he reminded her. “I was willing to do anything for you, Lena. I love you, and it’s not something I take lightly. I wish you’d trusted me more, but, now, there’s nothing I can do. I’m not telling you this to make you sad; it’s just something I thought you should know.” He moved towards the door and looked back at her. “Thanks for letting me in after closing and for giving me some small comfort. Take care of yourself, darling.” And he was gone.

Marlena sat for a few moments and absorbed it all. She’d had a man head over heels in love with her, so much so that he’d decided to change his world for her. And what had she done? She’d made him leave. Twice, Marlena reminded herself. Realizing she couldn’t make a mistake with him again, she dashed into the store.

“Shane!” He turned from the door he’d been about to push open to the street to watch her rush towards him. “Don’t go. Please, God, don’t leave,” she nearly begged.

Shane looked down into her eyes, finally seeing what he’d yearned for for six months. “What are you asking, Lena?” he asked quietly.

She caught her breath and looked into his eyes. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t trust you more. I don’t want you to leave again. I need you to stay, Shane. Stay with me, please,” she finished.

“Why?”

The question was simple, and so, Marlena realized, was the answer. “Because I love you,” she told him and watched the grin spread across his tired features. When he scooped her up and, pressing his lips to hers, spun her around, she could see their future—and it looked damn good.

***

I believe in you

I’d give up everything just to find you

I have to be with you

To live, to breathe

Several miles from where two friends of his were beginning to get their lives back on track, Brian stood outside the door to the bedroom he and Sienna shared and tried to muster up the courage to step through it. He was terrified of the memories that would assault him. Just standing outside the door was bringing back memories of when he would walk up the stairs at the end of the day and find Sienna waiting for him. Squeezing his eyes shut, he tried to control the pent up sobs that threatened to break him down.

He was glad no one was here to watch him struggle with himself. AJ and Nick had gone out to relieve their own tension. Brian was happy that they were there to help him get through each day, but he was also happy that they knew when he needed space. The team of FBI agents had dispersed that morning to interview Sienna’s family and friends to try to discover if there was anyone in the past that could potentially be a suspect. They had yet to return, although he knew Regan had come back and was set up in the office downstairs. Last time he’d checked on her, she had been on the phone with the police in the town where the last phone call had come from, trying to figure out where the guy could have gone and if anyone had witnessed him making the phone call.

Brian took a deep breath, calming himself down enough to gather the energy to open the door. As he turned the doorknob, the gate buzzer sounded, and he used it as an excuse to leave the door shut a while longer.

By the time he made it down the stairs, Regan was already at the speaker. She turned when he reached her.

“Do you know anyone by the name of Kelly Monaco?” she asked him.

Brian frowned. He hadn’t heard from Kelly since October when she had called to tell him she thought she’d found the man of her dreams. She’d been in a fender bender during one of LA’s worst rush hours. After exchanging insurance information, the man who’d bumped into her car had invited her out for dinner. Kelly had accepted and was thrilled with the guy, who had turned out to be an architect.

Brian looked over at Regan, now. “Yeah,” he nodded. “Yes, I do. We can let her in.” Regan hit the button then disappeared back into the office, leaving Brian to greet Kelly.

When he opened the door for her, Kelly launched herself into his arms. “Oh, Brian, I’m so sorry! I got here as soon as I could, even though it took a while. The directors and writers wouldn’t let me go,” she explained, leaning back and looking into his eyes. “Oh, Bri, everyone’s on the lookout for them. They’ll be home soon.”

He nodded and stepped back to let her into the house fully. “I’m glad you’re here,” he told her. “Which is strange because I don’t want to see any of my family and friends, except for AJ and Nick who are camped out here. Everyone else is so suffocating with all their caring and concern. And I feel terrible even thinking badly of them,” he added.

Kelly shook her head. “It’s understandable. I mean, with everyone here you must not have gotten enough time alone to just absorb what happened, huh?” At his nod, she continued. “If you want, I could stay in a hotel room and just drop by during the day. It’s not a problem.”

Brian sighed. “No, no. You’re welcome to stay, really. The only other person here besides AJ and Nick is Regan.” At her look, he added, “She’s the head of the FBI team helping to find Sienna and our kids. You can meet her, if you want.”

Kelly nodded. “That’d be good. Is the FBI set up here? Like in your house?”

“Yeah, I didn’t want them far away. I want to be there the instant there’s any news of anything. Plus, the bastard who took my family calls me, so I thought it’d be a good idea to have them here if he calls back, you know?”

She agreed. “Besides, it’ll make you feel more secure, too.” At his small smile, she reached out and squeezed his hand. “They’ll be home soon, Brian. I have a good feeling about this.”

Brian watched her for a few moments as he led her towards the office to meet Regan. “Kelly,” he finally said, “why did you drop everything and come? I mean, I like that you’re here, but we haven’t spoken in months. And, suddenly, here you are.”

She sighed. “I know, I’m sorry that I didn’t keep in touch, Bri. I mean, I heard about Luke being born, but I was so involved with Trace. Architect,” she explained at his confused look. “But, he’s out of the way, now. Things didn’t work out the way I wanted them to, but it was mostly me not being satisfied. But, yeah,” she returned to the subject. “When I heard about what happened, I thought my heart stopped beating. All I could think was ‘those poor babies and Sienna’. I had to see you, to make sure you were okay. Which, of course, you’re not. But, who would be, right?”

Brian listened to her ramblings with a smile. She was making him feel better, he thought, just as she had two years ago. For that, he was thankful. He enveloped her in a hug. “Thanks for coming. For dropping your life to help me pick up the pieces and deal with mine,” he murmured into her hair.

She leaned back and brushed a kiss over his cheek. “I’d do it for anyone I cared about, Brian. It’s what friends do. I just want to be here in case you need anything.”

He squeezed her hand, then opened the door to the office, where Regan was consulting a map on the computer screen. She turned when they came in and stood.

“Regan, sorry to interrupt,” Brian began. “Kelly wanted to meet you, so I thought we’d stop in. So, Kelly Monaco, Agent Regan Daniels. Regan, Kelly Monaco.”

Regan held out a hand. “It’s nice to meet you,” she told Kelly. “I think my mother watched “General Hospital” and said something about how amazing you are.”

Kelly grinned. “Thanks. It’s always nice to hear.” She looked around the room at all the maps that were set up alongside machines that clicked every so often. “Wow, I’m not even going to ask what all these things do. I’m just going to trust that you’ll bring Si, Kara, Serena, and Luke home safely.”

“That’s why I’m here,” Regan said. “I haven’t failed a case yet, and I don’t intend for this to be my first one.”

Kelly grinned at Brian as they left the study. “I like her. Why does she get to be so pretty? I wish I had that hair and eye color combination.” She shook her head at herself. “Sorry. Anyway, I trust her, and, obviously, so do you. When did the FBI get here?”

“Three days ago,” Brian told her. “They’ve been doing everything possible, but, when there’s not so much evidence, there’s not a lot they can do.”

Kelly squeezed his hand reassuringly. “Don’t worry, Brian. Regan’ll find them and bring them home.” She glanced in the direction of the front door when she heard it open. “Who’s here?”

Brian shrugged. “AJ and Nick probably. They went out to blow off steam. This whole thing has been bothering AJ a lot because he blames himself for not watching them more carefully.”

They both looked up as AJ and Nick bounced into the kitchen. AJ stopped when he saw Kelly, then a grin spread across his face.

“Hot damn! We’ve got us a pretty one,” he told Nick. He hugged Kelly. “How are you? When did you get here? And how the hell do you get prettier every time I see you?”

She grinned appreciatively. “AJ, I might ask you the same thing myself. I got here a little while ago, and I’m doing well. Which is more than I can say for all of you,” she added.

Nick sighed and sat next to Brian. “Well, it’s tough,” he told her. “The worrying and stressing is a real burden. But I don’t know if I could stop myself from worrying, you know?”

Kelly nodded. “If you didn’t worry, I’d think something were wrong with you. Anyway, I’m here to help. Anything you need done around this place, Brian, I’m your girl.”

“Thanks, Kelly,” Brian acknowledged her offer. He stood. “It’s getting a little late, so I think I’m going to head up to bed. I can show you your room, though,” he told her.

Saying good night to the other two, Brian and Kelly headed up the stairs, leaving Nick and AJ to stay at the table.

Nick looked over at AJ. “We should have tragic accidents, man. Then we’d get all the women worried about us, too.”

AJ scowled. “It’s not funny, Nick. This whole kidnapping deal is fucking scary, not cool. Kelly’s here because she’s worried about Brian, Sienna, and the kids.”

“I know,” Nick shook his head. “I was just trying to lighten the mood, AJ.”

“Yeah, well, lighten it somewhere else. I’m going to bed, too,” he told Nick and headed down the hall, leaving a muttering Nick behind.

As he passed the closed door to Brian’s study, he decided to stop in and see what was going on with Regan and the case. He’d tried to avoid spending time with her because he was afraid of his own self-restraint. Or the lack of, AJ reminded himself. She was tempting, but with any other woman, he could’ve shrugged and moved on. He couldn’t understand why she had become so embedded in his mind.

Shrugging it off, AJ pushed open the door to find her on the phone. She held up a hand for him to wait, so AJ wandered in and sat in a chair in the corner. He noted a giant map of a Virginia town enlarged on the computer screen. It had several red tick marks slashed across it, and he wondered what that meant. As he looked around at the various tools of her trade, AJ listened with half an ear to her conversation.

“Did you cross-check his background?…Nothing? Are you sure?…Jesus, who is this guy? How about old college friends? Ask Mrs. Dorough about those, too…No, not tonight. She’s got a newborn to take care of. Go by tomorrow morning. Okay…No, there’s nothing new here. Just head back to the hotel. I’ll call in the morning. Okay, thanks, Bishop. `Bye.” Hanging up, Regan turned to AJ. “Did you need something?”

AJ watched her for a few moments. She seemed a bit frazzled, and her hair had fallen out of the neat twist it had been in that morning. Her eyes seemed tired, and he wondered how much sleep she had been getting. He shrugged. “I just wanted to see if there was anything new. Which I’m assuming there isn’t.”

Regan sighed and sat in the desk chair. “No, there really isn’t anything new. We’ve been asking around for people who might have a grudge with Sienna and Brian, but, so far, we’ve turned up absolutely nothing. It’s frustrating, but there’s got to be something, somewhere.” She rubbed the back of her neck, wincing a little, and AJ frowned.

“Have you gotten any sleep?” he asked her.

She glanced over at him, surprised by the question. “I get enough, so don’t worry about me,” she told him.

AJ shook his head. “I don’t think you do, but, hey, it’s not my problem, right? I was just concerned about you. Or am I not allowed to do that?”

Regan closed her eyes briefly. “AJ, I don’t need you worrying about me. Really. I’m not going to overwork myself. I know my limits, and I won’t overdo it. Besides,” she added, “I can never get much sleep when I’m working a case, and this one is more frustrating than most. So, go, get some sleep. I’ll be fine. There’s not much more I can do here, anyway, so I’ll probably turn in soon.”

AJ stood. “Okay. Well, then, good night,” he said and left.

Regan sat back in her chair and tried to ease the tension headache she was beginning to get. Why did he have to be so concerned about her? It would be easier if he just asked her about the case, tried to help, and was done with it. But, no, he had to ask how she was and be genuinely concerned for her well-being. She didn’t know how long she could handle being around him and was afraid that she might have to move her work away from where she would have any contact with him. She hadn’t had any feelings for a man in years, and now, in the middle of an important case, was not the best time for her to develop them.

Turning back to the screen to run through more names, she tried to concentrate on the work and realized that she was more tired than she had thought. Knowing there was nothing more she could do tonight, she switched off the computer, tidied up the work area, and headed for her room.

Lyrics from “Flying High” Jem and “Taking Over Me” Evanescence

***

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