Episode 4: Ice Ice Baby
Part 2
“You’re kidding, right? This is a joke?” Nick threw the file folder down with such force that its top-secret contents spilled across the meticulously clean desktop.
The muscles under K’s jaw clenched as his eyes dropped to the clutter, but he didn’t say a word. Calmly, he lifted his head and looked past Nick to the open door of his office, where a nervous secretary leaned against the frame to catch his breath. “I’m sorry, sir. I didn’t mean to interrupt. I brought Red’s report from her meeting with 008.”
“Come in, Lancybassy. I’ve been expecting this.”
“I would’ve come in sooner, but as much as I would love being on the receiving end of some manly brute force, Nick scares me when he’s really angry.” Lancy sashayed into the room and handed K the report.
K flipped through the pages, quickly scanning over key words and phrases.
“And Red is…” Officer Littrell of the CIA started.
“The head of our medical department,” K answered without looking up from the papers.
“Everything okay?” Lancy leaned forward on his tiptoes until he was inches from K’s face.
Nick rolled his eyes as he turned back toward the door, hiding his expression from everyone in the room.
Eyeing Lancy’s intrusion, Brian opened his mouth to say something, but stopped when Jay subtly shook his head, suggesting it wasn’t worth the effort. Brian looked curiously at his cousin, amazed to see the corners of his mouth twitching as if he were trying not to break out into a smile.
“Everything seems to be in order, Lancy. We’re actively recruiting an assistant for Red so you won’t need to bring these much longer. However, next time, make sure you are expedient.”
“Okie-dokie, boss, cross my heart!”
Lancy smiled and winked in Brian’s direction as he practically skipped out of the room. Once the door was securely shut behind him, K calmly scooped up the loose papers and placed them neatly back in the folder. “I never joke about work, 008. Our duty is paramount.”
Jay and Brian looked at each other and snickered, thinking that K had no idea just how true that statement was until K met them with a glare that sent chills up their spines. Nick followed his boss’s gaze and met Brian with a look of pure hatred. “Boss, you can’t trust the U.S. government.”
Brian looked into Nick’s icy blue eyes, and the fire on his short fuse was now officially lit. “Excuse me?”
“I don’t think I need to repeat myself, but just in case your hearing is as good as your judgment, I said the U.S. fucking government are a bunch of selfish, lying bastards, and I wouldn’t trust you with that weapon any more than I trust a terrorist ring. Hell, I’m not sure there’s much of a difference between the two.”
Brian’s knuckles went white as he clenched his fists tight enough to turn coal into diamonds. “This is the kind of person you’re trusting the fate of the world with? Kev, I respect the hell out of you, man, but there’s a reason you and I are not on the same team.”
“Damn right, there’s a reason! Lucky for us, the gene pool is pretty broad in your family.”
“008!” K hissed. “You will get control of yourself right now, or you will find yourself without a job.”
Nick forced his teeth sharply into his tongue to keep it from running away from him. However, he was still so angry that he jumped when Jay placed a supportive hand on his shoulder. K also placed a hand on his cousin’s shoulder. “Different styles, but one purpose. That puts us on the same team. You are both exceptional, and I expect you to set aside your personal issues and find that missing weapon.”
Nick and Brian continued to stare one another down, and K quickly reached his boiling point. “Now,” he grumbled.
Jay forced a smile at the man he only trusted because K trusted him. “Why don’t you head down to the lab; we’ve already got someone working on it. With any luck, she’s cracked the system already.”
Brian headed for the door, making no mature effort to miss Nick as he passed. Nick quickly whirled around to confront him, but Jay wisely stepped in his way and grabbed hold of his punching arm. “Let’s go for a walk, kid,” he said, practically dragging Nick out of K’s office.
Jay strolled lightheartedly down the hallway but never loosened his grip on Nick’s arm. They were just about to find sanctuary in Jay’s office when they ran into Shazam. He smirked when he saw that Nick was agitated and ignored the warning look Jay gave him. “So, 008, I heard your first mission back went so well that they’re letting the CIA baby-sit you. They can’t even spare Diamond this time around; that’s too bad, man. Better luck next time.”
Jay felt Nick’s arm harden in his hand. He could have held him back, but he’d never really cared much for JC’s sparkling personality. Better him now than Brian later, he figured, so he let go. The moment Nick was free, his fist connected with JC’s face, sending him flying back against the wall. Nick didn’t stop to admire the damage he’d done to the pretty face and barely heard the muffled “What the fuck, Carter!” as he stormed into Jay’s office and plopped into the chair behind the desk.
Jay shut the door behind him. The moment it was secure, he burst into laughter. “Dude, if anyone asks, I tried my best to hold you back.”
Nick wanted to brood in peace, but watching his so-called “boss” crack up over the interoffice violence forced an unwanted smirk to appear on his face.
Jay smiled when he saw it, then became serious. “Got it out of your system now, man? Because you’re already on thin ice, and shit like that is not the best way to prove that you’re ready to be back.”
Nick sighed in frustration. “You know I can handle it. This ain’t about that.”
“I know you can. I am the one that assigned you this case.”
“Then why the CIA?”
“Hell, I don’t know. Personally, the guy creeps me out with all the smiling and the ‘pleases’ and ‘thank-you’s.’ And that damn accent! I had to listen to Emerald blab on for an hour about ‘that hot CIA guy’s sexy voice.’ You think I liked that shit?”
Nick smirked at the thought of someone as obnoxious as Emerald crushing on such a straight-laced fuddy-duddy. “But I know K, man,” Jay continued, “and if he wants him to go, then like it or not, you’re stuck with him.”
“Have you read the file? Do you really want America to get their hands on something like that? I thought HimTak was supposed to stay neutral.”
“Part of the glory of being the boss is that I get to read all the files, even yours. I know all about your sister.”
Nick flinched in surprise at Jay’s confession, and his eyes glossed over with moisture. Jay squatted down to eye level with Nick and dropped a hand firmly on his shoulder. “If K says we can trust him, then we can trust him. But more than that, I need you to stay focused on this mission. We have reason to believe that whoever stole that weapon is the same organization that was behind the Global Idol scandal.”
Flashes of his previous mission whizzed through Nick’s mind. Jay now had his full attention.
“You let Brian worry about that weapon. If we’re dealing with the same people, then there’s a chance that we might be dealing with–”
“Drums.”
“You gotta find him, man. He’s our responsibility.”
Nick nodded with new determination. He was responsible for that monster. And he was going to be the one to stop him.
***
Footsteps echoed through the metal laboratory as Brian made his way down, marveling at the size of the place. Kevin had told him to go there for more information on the stolen Russian weapon detailed in their file, while Nick had been pulled aside by one of the other agents.
Nick — the guy had no self-control and was a poor excuse for any type of agent. The government would never let someone like him become an officer for the CIA. He was amazed Kevin had let him in. Now his cousin thought it was a good idea to pair them together? Was this some unfair joke?
Brian looked around for the scientist he was supposed to meet. The “best in the business,” as Kevin said, for technology and the ability to get the information they needed. He first spied the large, complicated computer system and screen that displayed what he assumed to be other agents on missions. In front of it, a younger woman than him with curly, blonde hair and bright, blue eyes monitored the screens.
At the sound of his footsteps, she turned with a small smile. “You must be CIA boy.” She smirked. “I could hear you and Blondie fighting all the way down here.”
“Blondie?”
“Nick. Jay told me about the new mission, and so I’m trying to hack into the Russian government system.” She patted the chair beside her. “Take a seat; shouldn’t take too long. The Russian system is easier to hack into than the U.S. one, which, so you know, is shockingly simple.”
Was everyone at Himitsu Takana annoying? Or just the ones he was forced to interact with? “Wait a minute–”
“Chill. Call me Pearl, by the way. I was telling you how easy it is, so you’d tell them. Besides, HimTak isn’t out to attack America; we’re out to protect people on a global scale. We’re above the petty issues countries have with each other; we just want to keep the peace.”
“I want to keep the world safe too, ya know. America has the resources to do that, and–”
Her slender fingers flew across the keyboard as her gaze skipped between the main computer screen and Brian. This was the scientist? He wasn’t sure whether to be surprised or impressed. Yet, she did annoy him a bit, much like his new partner. “I hear you do things differently at the CIA than their other officers–”
“Whatever is right and gets the job done.”
“So we get each other. ’Cause it’s really just different ideas, same goal. Can’t say I’m a fan of government agents myself, but you seem okay. You’re K’s cousin, so I know you wouldn’t be here unless he trusted you.” Her lips curved into a grin as Nick began to make his way into her sanctuary of technology, weapons, and metal. “I like that Southern accent of yours, by the way.”
“Pearl…” Nick started as he stopped beside Brian, still fuming. Agent Jay had calmed him down a lot. He had a way of doing that, always able to relate to him. Still, the idea of working with this government pawn irritated him to no end. “How’s the hack job?”
“Allll-most done. By the way, Blondie, I loved that ‘Mambo No. 5’ performance. I saved that cute little moment on video.”
“You can’t… that’s just wrong!”
“What can I say? A performance like that is pure gold.”
The CIA officer raised a brow. “Maybe instead of trying to play wannabe-hero, Carter, you can sing and leave the world saving to the real agents.”
Two pairs of blue eyes met angrily. If looks could kill, both men would have been frozen to death by now from the cold, harsh stares alone. “Not even five minutes, and I’m already sick of your ass, Littrell! You couldn’t handle this mission on your own. All the government pawns do is fuck things up anyway. I’m on this to save your ass and keep it out of trouble.” To Nick, nothing he said was false. The man angered him beyond measure; all that Brian represented was, in his mind, worthless.
“You want to try saying that again?” Brian demanded as he stood toe to toe with Nick. This poor excuse of an agent didn’t scare him in the slightest.
“Hey! Agents acting like teenagers drugged up on hormones, I just got into the system!” Pearl’s voice called out, interrupting them both before they could go any further.
The two leaned over to take a look with furrowed brows, putting the squabble on hold for the moment. Nick shifted his eyes over to Pearl. “I can’t read any of it.”
“You and me both, buddy. This baby must be big; it’s encoded. And I’m almost positive it’s in Russian, to boot. A language I only know the basics of. Perfect. I’m okay with codes, but this isn’t my area at all, and I’d muck it up. Ugh, we’re gonna have to dig up the cryptographer, unless CIA boy knows how to decode this.”
“We have a cryptographer?” Nick asked.
“Yeah we do; we just don’t need him that often. Okay, where is my communi-com that links me to the specialized areas?”
Brian shook his head as he brushed himself free of invisible lint idly. “Forget it. I know a person. She’s the best.”
“Great, more government people.”
“Ya need to shut it right now.”
“Why? It’s true. It’s like how the U.S. government thinks it can bomb its way to peace. The people don’t want it, and yet they fucking do it. Perfect example. And ya know, bombing for peace is like fucking for virginity, and yet the U.S. government is THAT damn stupid–”
Pearl stepped between them, pushing them apart before it got ugly. “Okay don’t make me put you two in separate corners. You’re on the mission together. Deal. You can even vent to me later if it makes you feel better, Nick.” She smiled. “Brian, where is this cryptographer you mentioned? She really that good?”
A grin slowly spread across the CIA officer’s face, his dimples popping up amidst his defined cheekbones and lighting up his face. Just the thought of his girl made such a difference and easily helped soothe the frustrations he’d been dealing with. Ashavari… he couldn’t wait to see her again. “She’s the best, and she’s in LA.”
Pearl beamed as she patted the two of them on the back. “Good, you two go and promise not to kill each other. I will see it, you know. And I’ll find a way to stop it; just ask Nick,” she informed them with a silent chuckle as she thought of the underwear incident from the last mission.
Knowing what she meant, Nick smirked. Ignoring it, he started towards the garage door, which opened as he walked. He paused and turned his head back towards Brian. “Let’s go. Oh, and we’re taking my car.”
***
Once he saw the car, even Brian was impressed by the sleek appeal the vehicle had. He smirked as Nick used the remote to open the doors. “I’m driving.”
“Look, you can’t drive.”
“Of course I can drive; it’s just a car.”
Nick rolled his eyes. Stubborn. Typical government, ignoring the people, right? Fine, let him try, but he’d still show him. Nick discreetly pushed the remote to open the door, so Brian could get in, thinking all was normal. “No, I mean you cannot drive, you American Idiot.” To add to the insult, he started singing the Green Day song that inspired said comment. Turning the iPod on, he played the song, letting his own voice blend in.
“Don’t wanna be an American idiot.
Don’t want a nation under the new media
And can you hear the sound of hysteria?
The subliminal mind fuck America.”
Headbanging soon accompanied the singing of the Himitsu Takana agent, as his unwilling partner attempted to ignore him, turning the key in the engine yet again.
“Welcome to a new kind of tension.
All across the alien nation.
Where everything isn’t meant to be okay.
Television dreams of tomorrow.
We’re not the ones who’re meant to follow.
For that’s enough to argue.”
“Well maybe I’m the faggot America.
I’m not a part of a redneck agenda.”
Seeing the CIA officer’s face fuming, Nick skimmed back to the last line again, singing it even louder as Brian began attempting to start up the car. “I’m NOT part of a REDNECK agenda!”
Nick’s snickers were hard to keep in as he watched Brian’s eyes explode with rage when the car remained off.
“Your singing is worse than a bunch of starving donkeys wailing for some hay. And your car is a lemon.”
“Heh, told you that you can’t drive it.” Nick watched with amusement as he continued singing, his arms waving around like a mocking dance. “Now everybody do the propaganda… and sing along to the age of paranoia…”
Brian smirked back then, agitated and already wishing the mission was over. His accent came through as a result of his inner rage. “Told ya you’d be better off leaving the world-saving to the real men and go off to sing pretty ‘ole songs.”
“Shut up.”
“Stop singing.”
“Hell no. Heh, I don’t care what K says; we can’t trust you. I wish this mission was over.”
“Well, buddy, that feelin’s mutual. Now, why can’t I get this car to start?”
With a roll of his eyes, Nick climbed out of the car. One way or another, they had to save the world. And so they would. He just didn’t have to like it. “Get out.”
“Why?”
“I’m serious, aight? Get out.”
“Fine.”
Nick motioned for him to get in the passenger seat as he took his own seat at the steering wheel. The instant the car recognized his fingerprints, it suddenly sprang to life. With a grin, Nick sped out of the garage.
The car raced down the highway, nothing but desert all around them. Green Day’s song “Wake Me Up When September Ends” played on the iPod, projecting through the speakers.
Nick glanced at Brian, whom he knew was wondering why the car wouldn’t start for him. Maybe he could try the calmer, more mature approach. “See, Pearl modified the car, and it only lets me or her drive. Heh.”
Brian scrutinized the car, noticing the add-ons and new technology a classic car like this wouldn’t have. The CIA didn’t give out such neat toys. “It’s alright.” He smirked calmly. “I guess a below-average agent would need the aid of extra equipment.” The smirk grew mockingly at Nick.
Or maybe the mature way was stupid.
“Or…” Nick shrugged, acting as if he wasn’t bothered by the verbal jab directed at him. “You just wish you had one…” His hand came off of the steering wheel to point at Brian. “But you don’t…” The hand went back to the wheel so he could drive. He chuckled. “Sucks for you!”
Both men set their jaws, determined not to kill the other, no matter how tempting. One thing was painfully obvious to both: It was going to be a long mission.
***